mentula

juliana (who is a dear friend, a smoking hot chick and an absolute sweetheart [she hates it when I call her a sweetheart...she much prefers to be called a "Hardass Bitch"...but she is a sweetheart]) gave me a reply on my SG post to what I was whining about here yesterday

here is her reply:


You are allowed to whine. I don't believe you've met your whining quota in quite a few years now.

Time to max it out.


And maybe she's right. So I'm gonna give it a try. The only problem is one of the things I'm whining about will have to be couched in code and vagueness as it involves other people who I do not wish to betray or make uncomfortable.

So here goes....some whining.

January 18th, this last Tuesday, would have been my daughter's birthday (she died 4 and a half years ago). Time does heal wounds. But it still gets raw sometimes, particularly in this week and the week of July in which she died. I still speak with her all the time...and yet, the bummer week began, a cloud to hang over my head.

Next whining Matter. Tuesday was an all around fucked up day in that it was also on that day I had to close the door on someone who is very important to me. I was actually okay with closing the door until the Person In Question [PIQ], called me Wednesday Morning and wanted to know why the door was closing. It seemed obvious to me why it had to but not, at first, to PIQ. So I explained it and eventually PIQ came to see my point and understand why. PIQ had some issues as well which were germaine to our very long phone conversation but I can't divulge what that was without betrayal. So that's my second whiny matter and I'm sorry about the vagueness. Suffice it to say that PIQ was not only very important to my life but perhaps even vital to it.

That remains to be seen.

One final general "Fuck the World" Whine and I will get on to the good stuff

FUCK THE WORLD!

there...whining just doesn't feel right to me anyway.

I sent in an audition tape to HBO's Def Poetry Jam. I don't think my chances of making the cut are great...mine is not the style they seem to showcase on DPJ....but all they can tell me is "NO" so what the hell. For those of you that know my poetry I sent these three

1: Cattus Interuptus (The Cat Poem), a silly sex poem.
2: I My Father Today, a poem about death and obligation
3: Blood, my rant against religious fanatics


Finally another good thing

Mark February 11th on your calendars. On that date I will be hosting a poetry slam at Chico State University (California) and the feature will be The Suicide Kings (Jamie Kennedy, Geoff Trenchard and Rupert Estanislao). The first prize is $75.00 but I'm gonna try to get them to boost that a bit. I will keep you updated on this.


I'm not very good at whining am I? oh well...at least it's one more thing to whine about