melly

Yeah like I said my grass is all like a scene kid now and wants to cut itself. Boo hoo wah wah.

I got stuck in the elevator at work the other day with 2 poor souls that had to witness by nervous breakdown. No good considering my panic level claustrophobia. Fuck it, at least I didn't have to work for a few minutes. Could have been worse, though I don't know what was worse, my social anxiety or claustrophobia.

I am a former Jehovah's Witness and spent a good amount of time looking at Ex JW forums while I was at work today. I love that shit. It makes me nostalgic or something. I also accidentally ran over some kids and then proceeded to back my car up over their wiggling bodies. It was fun. Then I ate them in soup. Mmm delicious.

I was a douche today and revealed to my co workers that I used to eat Crisco shortening by the spoonful as a child.

Hope everyone had an un-lonely Valentine's Day.