mei

i'm really not a big fan of going to bars and not drinking. especially not going to bars when i think i'm only going to be there for an hour, and volunteering to drive, and then staying for four hours watching other people drink. my sweetie's dad was playing (he's in a blues band) and so the music was good, but dammit, that's just not enough for a good evening. and i was planning to stay home and drink rum and coke and dye my hair. *sigh* i'm just not cut out to go places, i think. i like home.

i need to make some non-drinking friends. like not hardcore never want to drink people, but i'm tired of being no fun if i don't want to go out and drink with people.

i hate how i get all annoyed about things and i have difficulty letting them go. just calm down, and breathe deeply, and pretend i'm having a good time... doesn't work so well for me.

there's a spider up near the ceiling. he's a little spider, but very very black. he's been there for awhile.. every so often he crawls around a little. maybe he's hungry - there's not much to eat in our house.

i think i'll take a shower. i smell like nasty dive bar. all full of cigarettes and whatever general funk happens there. eeeeewwww..

and maybe tomorrow i'll write about how soft bunnyfur is, or how i like to hug pillows, or how i like to do backward rolls down grassy hills.

tonight i'm just kind of vaguely irritated..

mood: if i had a knife i'd throw it into the wall and make it stick. not in an angry tempertantrum way, just in a nonchalant quietly annoyed way.



edited to add, in honor of cherry's suggestion, one of my favorite quotes!
"listen to me, now--don't you know who that Fat Lady really is?... Ah, buddy. Ah, buddy. It's Christ Himself. Christ Himself, buddy."