crazy connect-the-dots brain today. synapses zapping metaphors around the deep structures. my thoughts a fleet of small birds, blackspotting the sky. dewdrops clinging to a hundred tangled spiderwebs, occasionally coalescing to icily slip down my spinal cord. shiver.
look into my eyes. no, really look. can you know me? can you see the gold flecks shyly floating there? can you see the corona of amber acquiescing to the sea on a cloudy day? can you look through my pupils and tell that i'm not from here? not from anywhere?
wading up to my knees in a flooded street. dusty raisin sky and transparent rainbow.
starry streetlights in the reflection of a bare bulb on the edge of a waterglass.
heavy choking fear like swallowed cotton and humidity in a small dark room. fear of what? nothing. today. tomorrow. nothing.
crossing eyes against fuzzy black shadows on the bathroom tiiles. i see myself in the mirror, and i look surprised.
platypusses and beef jerky and ellipses and blood and violets and hail and microchips and and under the bed and jumping up and down.
ok, maybe that's out of my system now. i don't know. it's definitely helped some.
school was boring today, boring boring. only an hour of it, though. which is good. i'll do reading tonight, be a good girl and all. maybe this weekend i'll go dancing. i haven't danced at a club since i can remember.
nope.... the randomness is still here, but seems to be getting stopped up somewhere between shoulders and elbows. not reaching the fingers. clogging the works. oh well. es geht. ca va.
goodmorning goodevening goodnight moon.
look into my eyes. no, really look. can you know me? can you see the gold flecks shyly floating there? can you see the corona of amber acquiescing to the sea on a cloudy day? can you look through my pupils and tell that i'm not from here? not from anywhere?
wading up to my knees in a flooded street. dusty raisin sky and transparent rainbow.
starry streetlights in the reflection of a bare bulb on the edge of a waterglass.
heavy choking fear like swallowed cotton and humidity in a small dark room. fear of what? nothing. today. tomorrow. nothing.
crossing eyes against fuzzy black shadows on the bathroom tiiles. i see myself in the mirror, and i look surprised.
platypusses and beef jerky and ellipses and blood and violets and hail and microchips and and under the bed and jumping up and down.
ok, maybe that's out of my system now. i don't know. it's definitely helped some.
school was boring today, boring boring. only an hour of it, though. which is good. i'll do reading tonight, be a good girl and all. maybe this weekend i'll go dancing. i haven't danced at a club since i can remember.
nope.... the randomness is still here, but seems to be getting stopped up somewhere between shoulders and elbows. not reaching the fingers. clogging the works. oh well. es geht. ca va.

goodmorning goodevening goodnight moon.
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-j.joyce. (so cute!)