sorry i was gone for so long.. i decided to leave and go out of town for a couple of days without any notice - even to myself. it was nice. i read and watched movies. i played with a fluffy, senile aussie shepard. i made omlets and slept a lot. it was good for me, after last weekend's festivities. if you couldn't tell, i wasn't doing so hot after that.
so i have a funny story for you. i got my call about my second interview, which, incidentally went really well.
HER: i really hate to tell you this, but we've given the job to someone else. i didn't want to have to say this to you, this is the worst part of the hiring process.
ME: that's ok. (well really it's not, but i'm not going to say that to you..) did i do anything in the interview or on my resume that caused you to not hire me? is there anything i could have done better?
HER: you're really going to think it's dumb if i tell you why you weren't hired. your interview was flawless. your resume is perfect. your experience and schooling is wonderful. i would have hired you, were i making the decision. i'm actually a little bit glad that you didn't get hired, because then you would have had to deal with my boss.
ME: it wasn't my hair, was it? because i do know that the blue tinge could have been interpreted as unprofessional.
HER: no, your hair looked great. see, my boss thinks that he's an expert with handwriting analysis. he decided that, based on your handwriting, you weren't right for this position.
ME: oh, well, that's ok. i'm glad it wasn't something that i needed to change.
HANDWRITING??? not even that it was messy. but that's why i didn't get the job? because he analyzed my handwriting? i wonder if, as a lawyer, he brings that kind of thing up in court.. "your honor, clearly the hand of the defendant was trembling when he signed this accident report, indicating a guilty conscience. my client therefore requests that he take full blame for this accident." i thought lawyers were supposed to work on logic. sheesh. at least now i can hope to get the library job, which i'd prefer anyway. i should just put an ad in the paper.
"suicidegirl seeking employment. can type 70wpm and analyze the hell out of a modernist text. has beautiful soprano voice and is a highly accomplished public speaker. please, no jobs of a sexual nature, but will do nude data entry for a substantial additional fee."
the sky today, on the way home, was a little bit boring. there were dark clouds on the horizon, the color of gravel in the rain. they appeared to be unravelling around the edges; grey fraying silk. i'll have to wait until twilight for it to turn beautiful, when the sun shines from the other side of the sky, illuminating everything like stage lights. shining through treeleaves.
the weather here is still overcast. we had one nice day, but now it's cloudy again. i want nice weather. consistently. i want hot, sweaty, retreat to the basement when you're done roasting in the sun weather. a friend just got back from las vegas. her belly is all tan. i want a tan belly, too.
ok, naptime, i think.
s for all y'alls..
so i have a funny story for you. i got my call about my second interview, which, incidentally went really well.
HER: i really hate to tell you this, but we've given the job to someone else. i didn't want to have to say this to you, this is the worst part of the hiring process.
ME: that's ok. (well really it's not, but i'm not going to say that to you..) did i do anything in the interview or on my resume that caused you to not hire me? is there anything i could have done better?
HER: you're really going to think it's dumb if i tell you why you weren't hired. your interview was flawless. your resume is perfect. your experience and schooling is wonderful. i would have hired you, were i making the decision. i'm actually a little bit glad that you didn't get hired, because then you would have had to deal with my boss.
ME: it wasn't my hair, was it? because i do know that the blue tinge could have been interpreted as unprofessional.
HER: no, your hair looked great. see, my boss thinks that he's an expert with handwriting analysis. he decided that, based on your handwriting, you weren't right for this position.
ME: oh, well, that's ok. i'm glad it wasn't something that i needed to change.
HANDWRITING??? not even that it was messy. but that's why i didn't get the job? because he analyzed my handwriting? i wonder if, as a lawyer, he brings that kind of thing up in court.. "your honor, clearly the hand of the defendant was trembling when he signed this accident report, indicating a guilty conscience. my client therefore requests that he take full blame for this accident." i thought lawyers were supposed to work on logic. sheesh. at least now i can hope to get the library job, which i'd prefer anyway. i should just put an ad in the paper.
"suicidegirl seeking employment. can type 70wpm and analyze the hell out of a modernist text. has beautiful soprano voice and is a highly accomplished public speaker. please, no jobs of a sexual nature, but will do nude data entry for a substantial additional fee."
the sky today, on the way home, was a little bit boring. there were dark clouds on the horizon, the color of gravel in the rain. they appeared to be unravelling around the edges; grey fraying silk. i'll have to wait until twilight for it to turn beautiful, when the sun shines from the other side of the sky, illuminating everything like stage lights. shining through treeleaves.
the weather here is still overcast. we had one nice day, but now it's cloudy again. i want nice weather. consistently. i want hot, sweaty, retreat to the basement when you're done roasting in the sun weather. a friend just got back from las vegas. her belly is all tan. i want a tan belly, too.
ok, naptime, i think.
s for all y'alls..
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
After you told me about this blatent act of stupidity and lack of taste, I decided to look into this whole handwriting evaluation business.
Apparently, it's called "Graphology" and there are graphology personality tests you can take online. It all sounds very cooky to me, as my handwriting says that I am some sort of psycho with an assault rifle who's one step away from going postal.
Or the material I was reading was written in 1973, long before people stopped using pens on a daily basis and learned the art of 80wpm touchtyping...
We report, you decide. Any way it goes, this is just more proof that lawyers are scumbags.