meha

Well, Yeah. Today I got this text message from my "Best" friend and it was talking all this crap about someone when I realized, It was me she was talking about and had sent it to the wrong person. How shitty is that? Like, and it was stoopid stuff too, just random crap she had decided to pull out of her ass. So I called her out on it and she was all "Im so sorry, please dont hate me" and saying that she didnt know why she said that stuff. well, I just kinda left it at that, and said I didnt hate her but I was hurt and embarrassed that she thought of me that way. I guess in a way we are kinda even, (though hers is way worse) But last winter I asked her to get something out of my journal and she saw this page I wrote about her, not really tearing her apart or anything, but talking about how she was being annoying that week. And I know it really hurt her feelings. Still, mine was said to my journal, hers was said to one of our friends. I know she feels really bad, but does she feel bad because she hurt my feelings and it was a shitty thing to do? or is she just sorry cause she got caught?

I cant wait till Terrah gets home from Iraq. She is Seriously the only friend I have that I know without a doubt always loves me and would never intentionally hurt me. The only friend I can trust.

I have been having some other friend issues too. And some boy issues. And as retarded as it sounds I cut myself today. Actually I have been doing it all week. I feel like im 13 all over again. haha. Its weird, you can be fine for like a year, and not even think about it, but one little thing can set you off, any little thing, like your boss yelling at you or something, and then you doing it all the time again. Dont get me wrong, its not like im hacking myself up over here or anything..........

Im going to stop talking now. G'night.