medicinhed

In a bad way today.
I tried to make a clean break from my ex-girlfriend.
She wouldn't let me. She wants to hold on and I wish I knew why.
Well, actually I can hazard a guess.

I just want to feel free. I don't want to have to worry about her, even though I know I always will.
I hate this feeling.
We still love each other in our own way and I thought that would change after we broke up.
But it hasn't.

She is going to call me tomorrow so we can talk, but I don't know what we can talk about. I think we have been talked out at this point. We still draw each other though and that is hard.
I don't want to feel this close and intimate with someone that isn't going to give me the love and affection that I think that I deserve.

How do I tell her that being close to her and yet totally distant is slowly killing me?
I dread tomorrow.