mcroger

Recently, I have been dreaming about Matt who used to work in TNS, Matt sure is easy on the eye and heavy on the ear. He was one of them loud interviewers and sometimes when he was talking and I was talking if felt as if his words and his voice were coming out of my mouth, but that is not possible. Matt left before christmas and I was very, very, VERY sexually attracted to him, he is so very sexy, quite the alpha male, so he is.

Last night, just like the night before I dreamt we had started sleeping together and it had been going on for quite sometime, but never turned into a relationship (which was good) and we were at this party and spent the whole time flirting, not talking or touching each other, just flirting like what would happen between us in our waking life and then I had to leave and I was driving around with his friend and talking to him about how great Matt was and then we drove to Matt's and I was seducing him while he was sleeping and then just as he woke up in the dream I WOKE UP IN REAL LIFE!!!!! and then I feel back asleep and I was asking him to tell me about his trip away.
God, I miss looking at Matt.

But then, "I wouldn't want to be with anyone who could be interested in me..."
The fat girls guide to life is ruining my life.
It has made me question everything I ever believed about myself and if I spend my time pushing people who want to get close to me away because they are not right for me or because I think I am not right for them...
I WISH I HAD NEVER BOUGHT THIS BOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!