It's 5:12am and I just got home from work. Um, I went in at 2:00pm. Shite.
Aside from exhausted, how many weird personalities do I have to experience before someone understands that I GET IT!?! There are infinite possibilities for the eternal jest.
Mucinex works. Thankfully it was a slow day and my mucus was allowed to flow freely in great honkin' gobs of nastiness with out observation. Mmmm, mucus. On the plus side, I finally learned how to sing like a country star with an authentic southern nasal twang. Get a head cold ... you'll never forget how again.
New music customers have turned me onto. Lucinda Williams, Jimmies Chicken Shack and Atari.
What to never deal with again ... drunk lesbians that get paranoid after their seventh beer that every man in the house is upset that she's hitting on the female bartender ... even if the only other man in the house is the cook ... even if you explain that she's drunk and besides you're not interested ... even after you've given up and started hockin' up those bid nasty luggies right in front of her with full bass coughs. I am the sexiest bar wench when you're drunk, let me tell you.
Aside from exhausted, how many weird personalities do I have to experience before someone understands that I GET IT!?! There are infinite possibilities for the eternal jest.
Mucinex works. Thankfully it was a slow day and my mucus was allowed to flow freely in great honkin' gobs of nastiness with out observation. Mmmm, mucus. On the plus side, I finally learned how to sing like a country star with an authentic southern nasal twang. Get a head cold ... you'll never forget how again.
New music customers have turned me onto. Lucinda Williams, Jimmies Chicken Shack and Atari.
What to never deal with again ... drunk lesbians that get paranoid after their seventh beer that every man in the house is upset that she's hitting on the female bartender ... even if the only other man in the house is the cook ... even if you explain that she's drunk and besides you're not interested ... even after you've given up and started hockin' up those bid nasty luggies right in front of her with full bass coughs. I am the sexiest bar wench when you're drunk, let me tell you.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
loslope:
My joke went over like a lead zepplin. Ah, how about good job on the "honking gobs of snot" defense? Later.
delihound:
aww, if you get the chance, write loslope, he thinks he offended you. he's a good fella.