Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

matt_organic

United Kingdom

Member Since 2003

Followers 28 Following 32

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Thursday Aug 05, 2004

Aug 5, 2004
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
This has, all in all, not been a good evening. One of the things keeping me going through the past year in Blackpool has been the thought that my band might be on it's way somewhere once I get out of here. Recently it's started burning in the back of my head, because we haven't played a gig since November and I want to get our CD out. Our label and producer have started getting onto us about it as well, which I thought might get the other 3 into motion.

But instead I received a group email today from our guitarist - the guy I basically started the band with, lived with for 2 years and was my best mate in York. Apparently we've 'all moved on' from it now. This was news to me, since the last time I spoke to him he was as keen to get things going again as I was. I know that things can be tricky with me being a couple of hours away, but not really that tricky. I'm gutted about it to be honest, because I really believe in the band and because this is how I found out about it.

I know I put a few people through shit when I was in York, and I could have been a much nicer person than I was. But since I left it's seemed like hardly anyone I knew there has had an active interest in maintaining contact with me at all, let alone close contact. This includes people I spent pretty much every day with for years, who I considered to be closer to myself than any of the other friends I've ever made.

In some ways this feels liberating, now I have nothing holding me from flying off in whatever direction I want and making a new life for myself. But frankly I'm not the kind of person who finds a lack of ties to be liberating. I want a home, I want a close group of friends and places to go and hang out. I want what I had in York, and now I don't think I ever actually had it at all.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
ladymaze:
Ha...trust me, you should be disappointed. It was fabulous. kiss
Aug 9, 2004
lenorabell:
wish i didnt have to come back to york though!! it means work and studying....borrrring!!
Aug 9, 2004

More Blogs

  • 01.24.04
    25

    Saturday Jan 24, 2004

    Went to Lancaster last night to see my friend Shaun's first gig with …
  • 01.21.04
    8

    Wednesday Jan 21, 2004

    My God I'm on fire tonight. It's just a shame that only 4 other peopl…
  • 01.19.04
    20

    Monday Jan 19, 2004

    I've been unemployed for nearly 3 weeks and have yet to sign on... I'…
  • 01.17.04
    10

    Saturday Jan 17, 2004

    Just got back from a few days in Sheffield, where I went to visit my …
  • 01.09.04
    17

    Saturday Jan 10, 2004

    It's really bad at the moment. Everything's gone grey again. I'm real…
  • 01.06.04
    18

    Wednesday Jan 07, 2004

    Here is what 2004 has brought me already: - My computer finally si…
  • 01.04.04
    12

    Sunday Jan 04, 2004

    So, a new year is upon us. Here's to 2004 bringing me all my sweaty d…
  • 12.30.03
    11

    Tuesday Dec 30, 2003

    2003 So, here it is, my year. Not the best, but I'm sure a lot of…
  • 12.26.03
    15

    Friday Dec 26, 2003

    I still might disappear for a bit. But I thought I'd update you all i…
  • 12.24.03
    13

    Wednesday Dec 24, 2003

    Still not really sure what the hell is going on with the payment on m…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
9
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,120,514 followers
  • 14,920,612 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,392,861 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo