i'm tired. i feel used up and alone, all the time. no matter how much i try to do right i keep fucking things up worse. i have practically no friends, and i'm such an insufferable prick that i annoy myself. all i do is sit around the apartment and read. i hope nobody reads this shit. i just need to write. i've been back on anti-depressants for over two weeks now. no real change yet. i just need to make something right for a change. i'm tired of being tired and lonely. and i'm sick of not being capable of relating to others like a normal person. sick of alienating other people. sick of feeling alienated. sick of my job. sick all this. i want it all to be different.
