matamoras

Uggh, so this guy came to talk to us in class today. basically I'm fucked because I don't have all these saving accounts. I love how you're supposed to go from 18 to 19 with no slip ups and with financial sense in tow. It Kills me.

Anyway, 19 days left. 19 freaking fucking days till I'm free.
Can't happen soon enough.
I hate weekends...
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Faces are swirled into one another.
Names are certainly forgotten.
I can barely see in this dingy light with a tub of Italian ice melting on the table before me.
There is a girl at a round table near the stage, beautiful in an easy way with large beads around her neck. She is so comfortable in this place. This motel where no one is...
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I think my account on here is going to expire, but it's free so I don't really know.........

If I leave it has to be because I chose to, because I would make that decision 100 times over. That's it.

Ask for advice and you may not get what you expected.

My brain is upside down again. I always expect to wake up one day and for everything to be clear. It never is.

He insults me, little darts that aren't meant to hit or hurt anything. They do. They draw our class lines.
Mother's Day is a little painful this year. Starting to imagine what'd be like to say at 50 that I never had any children. Starting to feel a nugde towards wanting them. It's ok, he reassures me that feeling will go away when I'm away...
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That bracelet on my arm is my absolute favorites bracelet ever but it's not mine, I don't know what it's made of and I cannot find another one like it It's like a hard substance (like those jade bangles but has other colors in it.) It's my friend's - she just lets me borrow it.

I slept like 14 hours today. That's way too much.

You cannot quit things even if you find that you don't like them once you've decided you're no longer a quitter. This is a conundrum. It makes me make a face like this. Wouldn't want to be viewed as unstable or immature.