matamoras

Take me back to the start........
because I remember
December and the fogged out window
of your bathroom
when I was too sick in love to stay away
from you but so sick with fever that we turned your bathtub into a makeshift vaporizer.
One week alone at the beginning
as close to sex as we could get.
I was so sick, maybe the sickest I'd been
until that March when I fell even harder for you,
following you to the south in a tiny plane,
sunlight bouncing off my glasses and pop songs in my head.
I followed you into your world. I stole glances at your high school porn and your former life. You and the you caould not be reconciled.
And my fever climbed and climbed and I was so sick with mono that you never got and my ex did.
You brought me banana popcicles and in my heated mind I tried to reconcile you with the you I knew.

And it was nine months later, December again when I fell right out of the bed. The yellow and white room of the beach house was so sterile and honest and there were answers given I hadn't wanted to hear. Something solidified it and then I knew I could never reconcile the you and the you I knew.

A intrigued
S
O
N
D infatuated
J
F
M
A
M delirious
J
J
A
S
O
N
D dropped
J
F
M
A
M
J
J
A
S
O
N
D
J led
F
M
A
M
J
J left
A returned
S
O
N
D joined
J
F
M
A
M
J
J
A
S
O
N
D
J
F
M
A
M
J
J
A deceived
S
O
N
D
J