So today was kinda bunk but I'm cool. Mellowing out with smooth jazz in a half lotus position, nuprin cream on my aching lower back. Day started off waking up late and hung over. On the way to work I stopped off at McBlowass. I'm trying to listen to the news on NPR. There's this flaming gay black boy at the window sassing me, with his hands on his hips, like with the tops of his hands not the normal drill seargent palms and thumb pose. "I said how are you doing?" "Fine dude, hey, can you like chop chop I'm in a hurry..." "Oh anything for you...." So SwivelHips sashays off so fast he almost wipes out rounding the corner. He comes back with my order and change. Thought I was supposed to go to the next window. I was actually impressed with his speed as I took the order and money, when he dropped the coins on the pavement. SwivelHips was so flamin he actually gasped like and old lady who just saw a flasher. He also had a lisp. "Oh I'm sthoh ssthorry... let me get that...." "Nah, I got it dude."
I looked at like 46 cents, half of which rolled under my truck, then at ImpatientBitch behind me who would tailgate me if I pulled ahead. I'm not crawling under my truck, so I sped off.
When I got to work I heard the VP of Sales muttering (damn good hearing) across the office, "An hour late and still stops off for fast food..." Bitch. When will you realize that you take orders for a living and I give them.... I turned slowly in her direction. She looked back down at her screen. Thought so. The owner of the company once told her to not speak to me and that I could do whatever I wanted. I once took a job offer with lots of perks- training was in Italy for six months and they were kissing my ass every day like with a hot secretary "what would you like for lunch sir?" Eventually my old boss offered me more money to come back to "the front line." I was just playing them as I didn't have a passport anyway(very difficult to get in my situation, no old school records and all). Anyway I said "dobrei ootra tavarech" to my Ukrainian right hand man, and started running my tight ship. Lunch was late as I chatted with the boss about how to do what. Seems he wants me to build exotic wood entry units(bigass French doors) that are aluminum clad with complex ellipses and fancyass gold plated caming and stained glass. Like what kind of time are lookin' at? I tell him I'll go over the shit and get back to him tomorrow. These are like 15K$ units. I KNOW I can build 10 a week already but I'm just letting him stew so he thinks I'm all over it and busting my ass. This is why I chose the handle. I really am... MASTERCRAFTSMAN.
So Bill at lunch can vouch that there is this girl at the Showmars on Eastway who looks like Jessica Alba, with an even finer ass.... Although Bill is not the testimony you want. Sat there telling me he had a blackbelt in karate. FUCK I must look gullible BB. In my own few lessons years ago two knuckld pushups started the lesson. Callouses were thick and yellowish from pounding on shit. His fat pudgy pink skinned hands and large belly were so prominent....
So I asked the hottest girl at work out after lunch. She is 21, dark short hair, like 5'6"and 140lbs. Big Gray Eyes. Little heavy some think but those D-cups I could worship. Any guy or bi-girl would unconciously recognize that cradle of life. I caught her heading to the bathroom(not the best place, but I was a loser all last night on the internet so fuck it). "Hey, how ya doing?"
Clumsy, I know. "I'm fine." "Yeah, you certainly are
that." Getting better.... She was wearing a tight T-shirt and jeans, with a belt that was inscribed "CALL ME" on the back, probably what emboldened me.... "So what's up with the belt? You like a big time Blondie fan?" Smiles, looks at my hard dick, "No." "So maybe I could call you. Like to just talk. Or ask you out to dinner..." "You're very sweet... and I'm flattered... but I'm involved with someone. Sorry"
Sorry. Fucking sorry. C'est la vie.
I go tell Rick he's a prick for telling me she was hot to trot. Fucking longhaired fucker. Been in like a dozen bands. He is so fucking happy to see me rejected.
Later I ran into her at the coffee machine. "So how are you doing?", she asks. "Why do you ask?" I say. "Just makin' sure you're OK". Oh please, I am like GOD here. Don't EVEN condescend me. "You know I think that's not it at all." "What do you mean?" "I think, deep down, you really believe I'm what you've been needing. That I would comepletely ROCK YOUR WORLD." I was picking up her southern accent anyway, and it made it so easy to say. A bemused look was on her face. She snickered. "I don't think so...." I walked away abruptly then, under my breath muttering "Well, you just think about that...."
Later
I looked at like 46 cents, half of which rolled under my truck, then at ImpatientBitch behind me who would tailgate me if I pulled ahead. I'm not crawling under my truck, so I sped off.
When I got to work I heard the VP of Sales muttering (damn good hearing) across the office, "An hour late and still stops off for fast food..." Bitch. When will you realize that you take orders for a living and I give them.... I turned slowly in her direction. She looked back down at her screen. Thought so. The owner of the company once told her to not speak to me and that I could do whatever I wanted. I once took a job offer with lots of perks- training was in Italy for six months and they were kissing my ass every day like with a hot secretary "what would you like for lunch sir?" Eventually my old boss offered me more money to come back to "the front line." I was just playing them as I didn't have a passport anyway(very difficult to get in my situation, no old school records and all). Anyway I said "dobrei ootra tavarech" to my Ukrainian right hand man, and started running my tight ship. Lunch was late as I chatted with the boss about how to do what. Seems he wants me to build exotic wood entry units(bigass French doors) that are aluminum clad with complex ellipses and fancyass gold plated caming and stained glass. Like what kind of time are lookin' at? I tell him I'll go over the shit and get back to him tomorrow. These are like 15K$ units. I KNOW I can build 10 a week already but I'm just letting him stew so he thinks I'm all over it and busting my ass. This is why I chose the handle. I really am... MASTERCRAFTSMAN.
So Bill at lunch can vouch that there is this girl at the Showmars on Eastway who looks like Jessica Alba, with an even finer ass.... Although Bill is not the testimony you want. Sat there telling me he had a blackbelt in karate. FUCK I must look gullible BB. In my own few lessons years ago two knuckld pushups started the lesson. Callouses were thick and yellowish from pounding on shit. His fat pudgy pink skinned hands and large belly were so prominent....
So I asked the hottest girl at work out after lunch. She is 21, dark short hair, like 5'6"and 140lbs. Big Gray Eyes. Little heavy some think but those D-cups I could worship. Any guy or bi-girl would unconciously recognize that cradle of life. I caught her heading to the bathroom(not the best place, but I was a loser all last night on the internet so fuck it). "Hey, how ya doing?"
Clumsy, I know. "I'm fine." "Yeah, you certainly are
that." Getting better.... She was wearing a tight T-shirt and jeans, with a belt that was inscribed "CALL ME" on the back, probably what emboldened me.... "So what's up with the belt? You like a big time Blondie fan?" Smiles, looks at my hard dick, "No." "So maybe I could call you. Like to just talk. Or ask you out to dinner..." "You're very sweet... and I'm flattered... but I'm involved with someone. Sorry"
Sorry. Fucking sorry. C'est la vie.
I go tell Rick he's a prick for telling me she was hot to trot. Fucking longhaired fucker. Been in like a dozen bands. He is so fucking happy to see me rejected.
Later I ran into her at the coffee machine. "So how are you doing?", she asks. "Why do you ask?" I say. "Just makin' sure you're OK". Oh please, I am like GOD here. Don't EVEN condescend me. "You know I think that's not it at all." "What do you mean?" "I think, deep down, you really believe I'm what you've been needing. That I would comepletely ROCK YOUR WORLD." I was picking up her southern accent anyway, and it made it so easy to say. A bemused look was on her face. She snickered. "I don't think so...." I walked away abruptly then, under my breath muttering "Well, you just think about that...."
Later