Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

masseffection

Sioux Falls, SD

Member Since 2002

Followers 34 Following 40

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Monday Jul 17, 2006

Jul 16, 2006
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
I need stability. This is not fucking stable. I'm going insane. I just want to cry. Why can't ONE thing come easily? Please! It's ONE piece of paper that's making everything a mess. I don't want to be homeless in a month.

On another note:

If there's one thing I worry in this world about more than money, more than myself, more than pretty much anything.. it's my dad. Especially since my senior year when he tried to kill himself because of all of the money troubles that followed him. His dad gives him a hard time for it. At least eighty percent of his money troubles are caused by his wife.

My mom went and got herself fired from her job today. For what? Stealing money. From a NURSING HOME. What sort of lowlife does that? When I was in forth grade or so she went to JAIL for stealing, too. (Of course, she told me she was visiting a friend but my dad told me the truth.) She's been caught stealing cigarettes from a Lewis store, too. (She doesn't even smoke!) I've never liked my mom. She's a horrible person besides stealing. Ignorant, petty, a compulsive liar, a thief..

WHY does my dad keep her around? She's not even bringing home an income now. Even when she did have a job, she made sure to not get her checks directly deposited so she could take at least half of the money to blow on stupid things. But now, without her money especially... I don't want to see my dad be so depressed again. He wanted so much to help me move into an apartment and help me get a couch or something.. but now he can't obviously. He was going to come and visit me this weekend (I haven't seen him since March).. but yeah.

I sort of believe in fate. I look at my mom and think, "Great.. I'm fated to become a piece of trash. Trash to be thrown away." Maybe I should just disconnect myself from the world and leave it.. so I don't taint any sort of positive reputation I have before my life ends.

She'll be going to court on felony charges, most likely have to spend some time in jail, and it's going to be hard as hell for her to find another job. Oh, and she told her parents she was stealing the money for me. BESIDES the fact that I know I wouldn't have seen a cent of the money..

..I never ask my parents for money. Now it looks like I'm some lowlife she's was trying to "help." Grrr.
stompbox:
We don't turn out like our parents. Not unless we aspire to. So don't waste any time worrying about that. Disconnect yourself from that.

Not sure what else to tell you. I spend an enormous amount of time worrying about money, and it's never helped anything, but I still do it. I always figured by the time I was 30 I'd be pretty secure, financially, and stable in my relationship, etc. But it hasn't panned out that way, though really I know things could be a whole lot worse. Point is... well, I'm not sure. Just don't let your mom make you think you're less than what you are, and try to let your dad know he's not judged by his financial well-being. Easier said than done, I know.
Jul 17, 2006
fairyjochen:
$
Aug 4, 2006

More Blogs

  • 01.30.08
    3

    Wednesday Jan 30, 2008

    *Pokes around* *taps screen* Anyone still alive out there?
  • 07.28.07
    0

    Saturday Jul 28, 2007

    To un-explain the unforgivable, Drain all the blood and give the kids…
  • 03.22.07
    0

    Thursday Mar 22, 2007

    Ugh. That's all I have to say.
  • 01.25.07
    3

    Friday Jan 26, 2007

    So.. Boyfriend and I are seperating. It's one of those 'long time com…
  • 11.24.06
    3

    Friday Nov 24, 2006

    The best thing about working at a bookstore? The holiday rush isn'…
  • 10.04.06
    4

    Wednesday Oct 04, 2006

    Another year down the drain. Hooray.
  • 09.21.06
    1

    Thursday Sep 21, 2006

    Jobless. Moneyless. Schoolless. Fairly friendless.Gaining more weight…
  • 08.24.06
    0

    Thursday Aug 24, 2006

    So.. the past month. I dropped out of school due to financial diff…
  • 08.13.06
    2

    Monday Aug 14, 2006

    I'm tired of living but I don't want to die. ..Does that make sens…
  • 07.16.06
    2

    Monday Jul 17, 2006

    I need stability. This is not fucking stable. I'm going insane. I jus…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
13
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,119,176 followers
  • 14,924,007 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,401,627 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo