marybee

My eyes keep burning and i have to fucking piss. I feel like bitching about everthing everytime I sit down tp write one of my lame "journal entries." But then I think, who wants to read about someone who just whines. Then I think this is supposed to be a journal I'm not supposed to write in here purely for the attention. The I look at number of people who comment on my entries and it becomes obvious that I don't do it for the attention. I do it because I just moved six states away from the area I lived all of my life, I know noone except my roomates, my boyfriend, and their friends, I have no idea what I want to do with my life, my spare time, or my boyfriend who doesn't even fuck me anymore, I am SO BORED!!! Plus I like to fantasize that some day I will have enough balls to submit a set to this website because I would like the attention. So now you all know (by "you all" I mean the two people who will read half of this got bored and went on to look at naked people)what a bored lonely annoying person I am. I hate being such a drama queen but fuck it I'm pissed. I don't even know why. I feel ungrateful but I'm just so damn jealous of all of those people who have passions. I mean I paint but I could never pick up a brush again and I wouldn't really miss it that much. All I have that I would really miss is my friends and family (who I moved away from) and my freedom to whine. At least I usually feel better after bitching. Maybe I just need to get laid. But grrrr I could never cheat on him and I just don't have it in me to talk to him. So I went online and ordered some erotica novels. Those should be a nice read.


I used to have an unhealthy addiction to Buffy, it's very mind numbing. I feel like ordering the DVDs and zoneing out for days as I watch all of them but school starts again next week and I want to sign up at the gym so I think that's a bad idea. I should go sign up right now.


I want to be stronger and I think if I cranked my CD player and did something that was physical and slightly like meditating it may do me some good. I have never been into sports but I think I should take one up. well, I can hoola hoop but that's about it. I would like to get more into rock climbing but just as I started getting into it I moved away from the mountains so that doesn't really work.


Anyone know any entertaining sports I could get into? I'm not much into team sports and I have back problems so I can't do gymnastics or anything similar but I'd be up to pretty much anything else.