mandy

i forwarded this to several friends and they all said that they thought it was a true story about me. hehehe they know me well.......

enjoy....

Baked Beans
I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became

apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave

up beans.


Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home

from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and

told him that I would be late because I had to walk home.


On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was

more than I could stand.


With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects

by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew

it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans.


All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.

Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed

delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."


He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I
>>took a
>>
>>seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone
>>rang.
>>
>>
>>
>>He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and
>>
>>Went to answer the call.
>>
>>
>>The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the
>>
>>Pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of
>>
>>the room seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let
>>one
>>go.
>>
>>
>>It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running
>>
>>over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my
>>
>>lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other
>>
>>
>>cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked
>>
>>cabbage.
>>
>>
>>Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other
>>
>>room, I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was
>>
>>indescribable.
>>
>>
>>When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my
>>
>>freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin,
>>
>>placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very
>>
>>relieved and pleased with myself.
>>
>>
>>My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband
>>
>>returned, apologising for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked
>>
>>through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.
>>
>>
>>At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests
>>
>>seated around the table chorused:
>>
>>"Happy Birthday!"
>>
>>
>>I almost fainted.