Feeling low today.
My visit with the chiropractor didn't go well. I had to come to the realization that I can not, in fact, be 100% healthy. I can lessen some of the problems if I work really hard, but it'll never be cured. ...and the thought of that is really depressing. AND, upon coming to that realization, it makes me wonder about if I'd had a less stressful childhood that these things wouldn't have happened. Lots of fear/anger/frustration/confusion with no outlet as a child = fucked up body. Guh.
I know that I have a beautiful body no matter the problems, but it's hard to come to the realization that you've never actually experienced living inside a healthy body before. That's something I can never have.
My visit with the chiropractor didn't go well. I had to come to the realization that I can not, in fact, be 100% healthy. I can lessen some of the problems if I work really hard, but it'll never be cured. ...and the thought of that is really depressing. AND, upon coming to that realization, it makes me wonder about if I'd had a less stressful childhood that these things wouldn't have happened. Lots of fear/anger/frustration/confusion with no outlet as a child = fucked up body. Guh.
I know that I have a beautiful body no matter the problems, but it's hard to come to the realization that you've never actually experienced living inside a healthy body before. That's something I can never have.
phunkybrewster:
wow i identify SO much with this post. xxxooo
