"You are whatever you pretend to be"
-Kurt Vonnegut
Who would have figured that a video game could bless me with a lesson about life? I suppose it's not a lesson I hadn't heard before, but I think that just in the course of playing, I felt a tangible epiphany about the concept of how people can change. How you can do terrible and malicious things, revel in the suffering of others or things of a similar ilk, and as long as you really want to change- as long as you really make the effort to make yourself into something better, that you are never too far gone to come back from the abyss.
How should we choose to define ourselves, what should be the yardstick to which we measure who we really are? Should your past be what you are, that your actions done previously will always linger with you, no matter what you do? are you what you are right at this moment, regardless of any trials or tribulations you are going through at the time? If you are in a time of strife, should that mar what others should think you as? Or are you your future; What you believe you will become, in time. Should you have any right to define yourself by what hasn't yet come to pass? Is it proper to label yourself a master now because you are beginning to take the steps of an apprentice?
I am reminded of quotes and of the parables and stories of others when I contemplate myself.
"A man with an evil heart, a black soul that longed only to hurt and cause suffering onto his fellow man feared that one day his secret thoughts would be discovered, and that people, in their outrage and fear for themselves would destroy him. The evil man decided to concoct a plan, to outwardly show charity to those in need, to battle the ills of the world in a show to keep his nature from being discovered. The mans plan worked flawlesssly, and he lived to a ripe old age and died peacefully in his sleep, and would always be remebered and revered for the kindness that he had shown unconditionally during his life."
I don't think that if I live for forever and a day I will ever fully understand the nature of myself. Temel nosce... if only it was that simple.
-Kurt Vonnegut
Who would have figured that a video game could bless me with a lesson about life? I suppose it's not a lesson I hadn't heard before, but I think that just in the course of playing, I felt a tangible epiphany about the concept of how people can change. How you can do terrible and malicious things, revel in the suffering of others or things of a similar ilk, and as long as you really want to change- as long as you really make the effort to make yourself into something better, that you are never too far gone to come back from the abyss.
How should we choose to define ourselves, what should be the yardstick to which we measure who we really are? Should your past be what you are, that your actions done previously will always linger with you, no matter what you do? are you what you are right at this moment, regardless of any trials or tribulations you are going through at the time? If you are in a time of strife, should that mar what others should think you as? Or are you your future; What you believe you will become, in time. Should you have any right to define yourself by what hasn't yet come to pass? Is it proper to label yourself a master now because you are beginning to take the steps of an apprentice?
I am reminded of quotes and of the parables and stories of others when I contemplate myself.
"A man with an evil heart, a black soul that longed only to hurt and cause suffering onto his fellow man feared that one day his secret thoughts would be discovered, and that people, in their outrage and fear for themselves would destroy him. The evil man decided to concoct a plan, to outwardly show charity to those in need, to battle the ills of the world in a show to keep his nature from being discovered. The mans plan worked flawlesssly, and he lived to a ripe old age and died peacefully in his sleep, and would always be remebered and revered for the kindness that he had shown unconditionally during his life."
I don't think that if I live for forever and a day I will ever fully understand the nature of myself. Temel nosce... if only it was that simple.
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
Why am I writing this?
Anyway.
Funerals make me nervous, even though I'd much rather go to them than the wake. But still. I think this morning may bother me. I think I might need to call my mother, too.
My friend, the one I mentioned to you the other day, sent me a message and told me she's in Jersey and will call me today about hanging out. Is it horrible of me that I'd rather sleep, wake up, do laundry, and dye my hair, instead? There's a possibility I can see her Sunday.
Alright. Back to my late-night companion: my television.
Xx