maladjusted

Date with Shay went well last night..I finaly saw the next Happy potter its was wonderful...
She wants to see me again over the next tree days..I'll see her tonight at hooks for my pal sarah's b-day bash..then she invited me over to watch football,knowing damn well I dont watch football of follow any sports for that matter.
That makes me say hmmmm...
ither she doesnt listen very well or she just wants to spend time with me..im feeling kind of ..ambivalent about her.
we have heat..but heat is something I make..I have passion.
we will see.

I invited a different girl to come meet me to play some airhockey I really hope she shows up.it should be interesting with her there and Shay also going.hahah im my own worst enemy.

Vanilla Sky just came on tv..this move always makes me think of my last suicide attempt..the part were he has taken the pills and is laughing in one breath and weeping the next.Its one of the last things I recall before everything went black.
It makes me alittle sad..but its good to recall where I was at that time.and what a broken little thing I was.
Im not that person anymore...its still in me..but I think im stronger now then I was ever before...
Sadly my heart is'nt as open as it once was.
My heartsa wee bit more guarded then before.

Ok I've started to ranble..so im off.
be well all.
Have a super good weekend with lots of smiles.
xoxoxoxoxox