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magnusopum

Member Since 2009

Followers 23 Following 27

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Monday Nov 16, 2009

Nov 16, 2009
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There have been so many times in the last year where I've felt I've tried my hardest. I've pushed myself on new things, I've stopped doing things I shouldn't and I've passed the tests I needed to.

But no matter how much I've put in on some things I've still failed. And I'm suffering because of it. I hate failure.

I always want the best and I strive to achieve that. I keep putting the effort in and when I don't see results I question why. Then I try again.

It's when I keep putting the effort in, keep grinding myself down and still never getting anywhere that I get dispondent. And right now that's how I feel. Alone, despite all the things I've achieved.

I know it'll change. One day.

But I feel I need to allow myself a moment to break down and give in to the pain that makes me feel so angry. Just for one second stop pushing. Stop trying. Just give up and start again.

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