Suprising little drama right now, other than the growling stomach.
Life is good. A little boringly good right now. A datish thing was cancelled, that might have added a little drama for me to chew on if it wasn't.
I passed on trying to hook up with a super cute girl for the datish thing. I had been seriously thinking about it this week and its Tuesdays and Thursdays if I want to take a shot at her. When I called to set the datish thing it was Tuesday and I needed sleep. But I'm almost always hesitant because she's also an attached girl, I'll call her L(2)*. I know she'll be around for me later, she practically told me so, but I feel like I have kept her waiting for so long and the anticpation has been building and building. I'm teeter tottering about her. On one hand she is super cute, virtually loves me (yes like I-changed-her-life-loves me). On the other hand there is a potential of a broken heart in the making with me as the asshole because she has a bfriend.
The thing is I've known this woman for more than a year now, wow, maybe two. She tends at my after work bar and she was my first confidante. She was there when I was married and first contemplated cheating. I had asked a girl to meet me at that bar and she didn't go. I thanked my lucky stars that she didn't show up because I never had to become the asshole. I never tried to cheat again. But I was able to tell someone my innermost secrets. Things that were haunting me and bugging me. She was there when my swinger neighbor was trying to seduce my wife and I. And when I knew my wife wanted to see me have sex with him. I told her the secret goings on in my marriage then. Then when we opened our marriage. When we separated. When we divorced. When I started dating. She had heard it all and she had gotten turned on many times listening to me get excited. We have this mode where we are like old secret lovers who know how to love and let go.
She's gorgeous, creative, fairly connected, travels the world to do House music shows all the time. My wife met her once and was terribly threatened by her. Even though we had an open marriage I was forbidden from having a drink before I came home because it made her worry that I was sleeping with L(2). Things got so crazy with my X about L(2) that she convinced herself that I slept with her and marked that as the date we separated legally! it was just some random day that I worked late, had a drink (even though I wasn't supposed to) and was in a pretty chipper mood. But I never did and if I did she's got a damn boyfriend! I don't want her to leave her boyfriend. She doesn't want to leave him. Now I wish I had...you know if you do the time might as well do the crime.
I've never been the asshole before and I had never been in a mess like that either.
So if i finally finally choose to go for it ...Tuesday or Thursday nights.
If I can find other women to distract me that would be so much better. C'mon ladies distract me and save my soul. Please!
Anyway I have a cute target to aim for on Sat named H, a server who charmed me last weekend. C likes her too but I'm going alone to investigate first.
*[there's already L(1) the music therapist who by the way is going to have a documentary made about her - I should give her a call]
Life is good. A little boringly good right now. A datish thing was cancelled, that might have added a little drama for me to chew on if it wasn't.
I passed on trying to hook up with a super cute girl for the datish thing. I had been seriously thinking about it this week and its Tuesdays and Thursdays if I want to take a shot at her. When I called to set the datish thing it was Tuesday and I needed sleep. But I'm almost always hesitant because she's also an attached girl, I'll call her L(2)*. I know she'll be around for me later, she practically told me so, but I feel like I have kept her waiting for so long and the anticpation has been building and building. I'm teeter tottering about her. On one hand she is super cute, virtually loves me (yes like I-changed-her-life-loves me). On the other hand there is a potential of a broken heart in the making with me as the asshole because she has a bfriend.
The thing is I've known this woman for more than a year now, wow, maybe two. She tends at my after work bar and she was my first confidante. She was there when I was married and first contemplated cheating. I had asked a girl to meet me at that bar and she didn't go. I thanked my lucky stars that she didn't show up because I never had to become the asshole. I never tried to cheat again. But I was able to tell someone my innermost secrets. Things that were haunting me and bugging me. She was there when my swinger neighbor was trying to seduce my wife and I. And when I knew my wife wanted to see me have sex with him. I told her the secret goings on in my marriage then. Then when we opened our marriage. When we separated. When we divorced. When I started dating. She had heard it all and she had gotten turned on many times listening to me get excited. We have this mode where we are like old secret lovers who know how to love and let go.
She's gorgeous, creative, fairly connected, travels the world to do House music shows all the time. My wife met her once and was terribly threatened by her. Even though we had an open marriage I was forbidden from having a drink before I came home because it made her worry that I was sleeping with L(2). Things got so crazy with my X about L(2) that she convinced herself that I slept with her and marked that as the date we separated legally! it was just some random day that I worked late, had a drink (even though I wasn't supposed to) and was in a pretty chipper mood. But I never did and if I did she's got a damn boyfriend! I don't want her to leave her boyfriend. She doesn't want to leave him. Now I wish I had...you know if you do the time might as well do the crime.
I've never been the asshole before and I had never been in a mess like that either.
So if i finally finally choose to go for it ...Tuesday or Thursday nights.
If I can find other women to distract me that would be so much better. C'mon ladies distract me and save my soul. Please!
Anyway I have a cute target to aim for on Sat named H, a server who charmed me last weekend. C likes her too but I'm going alone to investigate first.
*[there's already L(1) the music therapist who by the way is going to have a documentary made about her - I should give her a call]
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and i'd love to hear what you think about my pop culture ravings, if you ever get the energy
i'm in a similar situation as the one w/ L(2). there's a girl that has been there through both of my big relationships, including my current one. i've bled my heart out to her, and we've recently discussed our feelings for each other. it's killing both of us because i don't want to cheat on my bf, but i don't want to break up w/ him, either. unlike your situation, i'm afraid that she will find a distraction, and get so distracted that i'll lose my chance with her...i guess these are the risks you take by being in a committed relationship.
i'm glad to hear the beach day was fun. i wanted to go, but couldn't make it. hopefully there will be another event soon that i can go to. *whines* i want to meet cool people too!!!!