Thursday Feb 24, 2005

0
I hate it when people use the word "literally" wrong.
Example:
Oh my god! I lost my wallet! My life, my WHOLE entire life was literally in my wallet!"

(that was said to me earlier this week)

I told him that I too live in a wallet. He didn't get it.
Fucking hell.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
thistle:
yeah, people don't seem to understand that literally doesn't mean the same thing as very. anyway yeah bacon tastes good.
mercie:
bahahaha

You're rad.

Tuesday Feb 22, 2005

0
Last night I woke up drenched (literally). My sheets, my comforter, my boxers, it was so gross. I was fever-licious. I haven't had one of those since I was in highschool. I am sick with the increasingly popular FLU that seems to be getting to everyone.
Fuck the fuckin' flu.
A long time ago I had a girlfriend that would give me blow job after...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
margot_dent:
dont sigh for me, argentina.

i hope youre feeling better.
kybella:
Yuk. Not good. See, it doesn't feel too good does it? Bummer, man. Get a couple more blow jobs from a couple more gals- you'll feel better in no time. biggrin

Sunday Feb 20, 2005

0
HA!

This cracked me right the fuck up.

Lucky mother or cursed housewench?

On another note, work sucks and eating out all the time is just too damned expensive...
krabuki:
You need a nice home cooked meal!

Where are you working?

Monday Feb 14, 2005

0
What I want to see:

A bald headed chicken.
A giraffe in a top hat with holes for his whatever the hell they are, antlers?
A naked person playing the harp for esteemed guests at a five star hotel restaurant.
A giant hot air balloon with the ghosts of Jimmy the Greek and Louis Farrakhan having a thumb war in the gondola.
A picture of...
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VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
margot_dent:
see, thats why no one should ever ever question my superior taste in music. huzzah!
glorybox:
Yea... i seem all sweet an innocent... but i got a mouth like a sailor when it comes to bad drivers!

Sunday Feb 13, 2005

0
I think it's funny.
We have a channel here in Texas called the Austin Music Network. It has videos from major label bands but mostly indie label bands and local unsigned talent. Anyways, most of the videos are just filmed HORRIBLY. Without exaggerating, it sometimes seems that a five year old with a video cam filmed these bands and then very very sloppily put together...
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arina:
happy Valentines Day!!! kiss
glorybox:
HAPPY V-TINES!

Saturday Feb 12, 2005

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The band: THE OCTOPUS PROJECT from Austin, TX.
Very cool show. They all switched instruments often which shows true talent. I give them super props. ...and the hardest hitting drummer I have ever seen! He hit even harder than the insane drum menace, Kevin Holmes from our local San Antonio rock veterans THE CINDERLEAF. That was previously thought impossible. Holmes, however is the better drummer....
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kybella:
Man, I totally had you....for like the longest time. Funny.

Yeah....coffee and then we'll discuss all the other stuff. biggrin
cureelise:

Wednesday Feb 09, 2005

0
I love my ex more than I've ever hated anybody and hate her almost as much as I am capable of even though she deserves niether...
Hmm...
Strangest mix of the most extreme of human emotions...

Life is really stupid
with lots of hubub
to keep you busy
but really not amounting to much...

The above is Steve Martin's take on Shakespeare's
"Life is a...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
kybella:
Surprise.
cureelise:
One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small,
And the ones that Mother gives you don't do anything at all.
Go ask Alice when she's ten feet tall.
And if you go chasing rabbits, and you know you're going to fall,
Tell 'em a hookah-smoking caterpillar has given you the call.
Call Alice when she was just small.
When the men on the chess board get up and tell you where to go,
And you've just had some kind of mushroom, and your mind is moving low,
Go ask Alice. I think she'll know.
When logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead,
And the white knight is talking backward, and the red queen's off with her head,
Remember what the doormouse said: "Feed your head! Feed your head!"

Sunday Feb 06, 2005

0
I can't find my science book.

This just in!

I found it. It was beneath my shut-in sized lover. She's a fresh 872 lbs. and as I was sponge-bathing her the other day I was also studying. Well, what happened is that the science book is blue so undoubtedly my large lover (Mimsy) thought that the book was an enormous square blueberry pie. After I...
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arina:
thank you sweetie! kiss
cureelise:
She takes a plastic pill
She plays the weatherman
She screams "Religion kills
More than it saves you, man"
She painted filigrees
She was the acid queen
She claims society
Is just a fever dream

Sunday Feb 06, 2005

0
I just met the cutest girl tonight...
She walked out of the bar right in front of me when everyone was kicked out for closing time and I saw her and I said out loud (but to myself) "wow, you're cute."
She didn't hear me. No one did.
But then she stopped with her friend and she turned around and happened to be right in...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
cureelise:
what are u waiting for CALL HER
india:
good luck! you deserve a nice girl.

Friday Feb 04, 2005

0

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zephyra:
I don't know him.

Friday Feb 04, 2005

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Resign yourself to knowing full well that what you do know, while perhaps interesting, means nnothing.

My advice? Regularly steal from people who regularly attend church.
tuxy:
What the ....?

Wednesday Feb 02, 2005

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"I am better than everyone else at pool and darts.
No one can defeat me."

See, I never say shit like that.

I'm prolly the best at most other things too, it's just that I'm a modest and slightly humble guy.
When people try to get one up on me, I don't make a scene or wave them off, I most championly accept the challenge...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
leya:
of course that line worked, I was all "awwwwwww that is the sweetest thing anyone's said to me all week, we should totally bone"

wouldn't any girl?
clara:
Vaginas really care for themselves, mainly. They also don't embarass you with being either too large or too small in inappropriate situations. You should be jealous.
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