Sunday Oct 31, 2004

0
Well I'd say the partys over, there is someone puking in the sink as I speak. We drank two handles of captien morgans rum. I'm a pirate at heart. And I'm drunk as hell. I have a huge lump on my hand frim getting hit. I'm going to watch TV.
I'm a loser. Love you all. xoxooxxoxoxoxoxoxo..........
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
hendry:
I can't believe you were out so early.
blck_flwrsplease:
thats great halloween makup on your pics. it looks real - is that real on your arm on the other pic? youre really pretty and your art is really cool - later

Saturday Oct 30, 2004

0
I'm totally board.... I wanted to got see "the grudge" or "saw" tonight but, I'm poor. So I guess I'll sit down w/ the remote and, watch another fear factor marathon. I want a new profile picture too, so maybe I'll try to make my photoshop work. It never does. We are having a halloween party tomorrow night. I've never celebrated halloween before. I'm dressing...
Read More
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
laptop_romeo:
A pregnant nun IS funny! Heh.
minibeanie:
I never like any of my pics, thats why I have an avitar on my profile.....

Ohhhh, Halloween parties are soooooooo fun..... kiss

Friday Oct 29, 2004

0
Something intersesting actually happened in my life! My room mate failed a piss test and the military police searched our house. I was very upset to find 3 gun packing cops rummaging thru my nightstand. And everyone knows the things people keep in the nightstand. blush After 4 hours of picking thru EVERYTHING! They decided we weren't dealers.
They mostly turned there attention to me, I...
Read More
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
cyanidedreamz:
A month without is huge. Congrats.

After I dyed my hair bright red, I had people bothering me at work about looking like a druggy. This one guy even had the balls to tell me he can always tell when someone is into drugs just by looking at them, and that 'druggies' always think they look normal, but they really don't. And then he told me I should stop doing drugs because they're 'just not good'. Which is funny, 'cause at the time that happened, I hadn't touched a single drug in 2+ years...
laptop_romeo:
Whoa! You live an exciting life! And one month is a great accomplishment. You get a visit from my Cat

Wednesday Oct 27, 2004

0
A professor is giving the first year medical students their first lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing is that you must have no sense of fear."

At this point, the lecturer sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, pulls it out, and then...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
thearcanecircle:
thats fucking hilarious. A fitting end to a drab day. I guess its my turn to be the downer in our friendship. surreal thanks for caring though.
nemisis:
now that's pretty funny.

Tuesday Oct 26, 2004

0
One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered the bedroom window. As the young lady parted her legs the bee entered her vagina. The woman started screaming, "Oh my god, help me, there's a bee in my vagina!".

The husband immediately took her to the local doctor and explained the situation. The...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
blck_flwrsplease:
thats a really funny story - your picture on the self-mutilation group photoset is really cool - just wanted to say hi - where is more of your art posted? later
fuzzycheeze:
hahaha! hell yeah, that's funny.

Monday Oct 25, 2004

0
How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place in laundry hamper

2. Walk to bathroom wearing bathrobe or towel. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror make mental note to do more sit-ups.

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
mistersalt:
Of course I've heard of naughtytuck...

what could make you move from such a sparkling town?
hethral:
I think there's normally more scratching involved that just in front of the mirror.

Sunday Oct 24, 2004

0
Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
-Robin Williams

Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.
-Roseanne

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
-Billy Crystal


We have women in the military, but they don't...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
minibeanie:
I copied and pasted them all to my computer.....Im still laughing..... kiss
the_scummiest:
the quotes by Jay Leno and Billy Crystal were hilarious.

Thursday Oct 21, 2004

0
A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly man, tossed his pants to his bride and said, "here put these on." She put them on, and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I can't wear your pants," she said. "That's right!!" said the husband,...
Read More
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
sympathy4devil:
LMAO Thats cute.
Thanks for the birthday wishes!!!
shaneka:
I thought that was funny...

Thursday Oct 21, 2004

0
I was just on my way to check my self into the suicide ward, but I went to walmart instead. So I guess you could say Walmart saved my life... lol....Is it wrong to laugh at that?
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
madi:
Surprisingly enough this has nothing to do w/ the drugs...
I need to have a sense of humor about this, Please no one be worried there are many things I have to live for. And I'm a pussy. I have to get naked on this site before my life will be complete... and I want to get a surface peircing... All I can say is marriage is REALLY FUCKING HARD!!!!! add being 3000 miles away from everything you've ever known, poor and sick. Its a depression milkshake.
zahara:
Wal-Mart SAVED your life??? eeek

Usually whenever I go into that damned store I feel like killing myself. (before anyone says anything...joke, it's a bad joke, albeit true).

Yes, marriage is hard. The first year is the worst because you have to get used to being married. It was really hard for me because I'm so fucking independant. My husband and I fought more the first year than the six years that have followed.

BTW--Yes, you do need to get naked. We both need surface piercings (I want my nape done).

Tuesday Oct 19, 2004

0
Come to the dark side; we have cookies....
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
auggie:
I've had a shit week. My boyfriend broke up with me. He doesn't like my friends whatever and basically asked me to choose. How 10th grade. My roommate kicked me out Sunday, but took me back on Tuesday. It's still tense of course. Oh yeah, my b/f hates my roommate and vice versa. There's a long and crazy story to all that - I could write a book. My beautiful and most awesome friend is going to detox today. I am so psyched about that. That shit is holding him back. He is such an amazing person, carved from a mold not of this earth. I fucking love that kid, he's been there for me and is one of two people outside of family I trust. I trust a junkie 110%. How odd is that?
laptop_romeo:
Give the monkey a cookie!

Tuesday Oct 19, 2004

0
I haven't had a moment to myself in almost 3 days. My room-mate had surgery. He expects me to cart him around like a child. Total; I've spent 9 hours in the emergency room cause he wants more pain killers. If he didn't eat 10 a day he might have a few to spare. When I cracked my skull open they only gave me cheap...
Read More
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
laptop_romeo:
Yes we are. You are a saint for sticking with him.
zahara:
Yes, men are babies when it comes to any type of pain.
Join Now to see more