maddy

so yet again i wake up with a headache. i think all my moms liked their presents which is good.

i woke up to watching maury because we don't have cable. since when has he gone down hill. every show i have seen lately has been paternity tests and lie detector tests. it makes me feel good that i know i am in control of myself and will never have to deal with something like that. thats entertainment.

the dreams have quieted down. so back to normal sleep and not walking around work with sex and violence in my head. which they aren't bad, but when i feel guilty for something i didn't do in real life, it kinda brings down my mood.

i am off today and it is such a great feeling, well at least until i think about all the things i have to do because i am off.

i think i might make a few more flower pots and just sell them at a small little garden store. something for fun and small profit. people eat that shit up. someone gave me the idea of doing maintenence on ponds since i love fishys so much. i could clean them in the spring and then keep check on them all summer for a small fee. that is hoping i get my job i want and can make my hours. i need to do something i enjoy for a change.

i can't wait for cape cod. i want to go now!