Fair warning, somewhat emo post.
I'm actually finding myself fairly sad that I only received one present this Christmas, instead of, really, the expression of excitement I had posted before. Maybe it's spurred on by watching the foster kids I work with unwrap fun wish after fun wish Christmas morning Which has led to self-analyzing. The shallow side would just love something, thing or tattoo, that I've been wanting and can't get myself; I've been overdrawn a bit lately. The deeper understands that, for the foster kids, being "thing" obsessed represents to them having or not having a family that cares about them to provide. And it does, really, remind me that I don't have much of a family that cares about me. All of the Christmas commercials, movies, as much as I love them, make me sad because of this. All these combinations of family and presents, having something I've lacked for a very long time. Silly, right?
P.S. - Here's hoping that this doesn't come across as a "whine, why don't y'all get me things," rather than just wanting some sounding board that isn't tied into coworkers/more of the personal.
Perhaps I shouldn't post when this tipsy/tired after working three back to back 15 hr shifts over the past few days. Delirious is me! Although I really did enjoy working with the kids on Christmas. And spending more than 7 hours cooking!
I'm actually finding myself fairly sad that I only received one present this Christmas, instead of, really, the expression of excitement I had posted before. Maybe it's spurred on by watching the foster kids I work with unwrap fun wish after fun wish Christmas morning Which has led to self-analyzing. The shallow side would just love something, thing or tattoo, that I've been wanting and can't get myself; I've been overdrawn a bit lately. The deeper understands that, for the foster kids, being "thing" obsessed represents to them having or not having a family that cares about them to provide. And it does, really, remind me that I don't have much of a family that cares about me. All of the Christmas commercials, movies, as much as I love them, make me sad because of this. All these combinations of family and presents, having something I've lacked for a very long time. Silly, right?
P.S. - Here's hoping that this doesn't come across as a "whine, why don't y'all get me things," rather than just wanting some sounding board that isn't tied into coworkers/more of the personal.
Perhaps I shouldn't post when this tipsy/tired after working three back to back 15 hr shifts over the past few days. Delirious is me! Although I really did enjoy working with the kids on Christmas. And spending more than 7 hours cooking!
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For the past couple of years i spent my christmas with my now ex-girlfrend and step-son. Being without them (or well..without Dylan, don't miss his mom at all) was scary for a bit. The trick for me was not to focus on what I was missing, or would have liked to have had, but on what I do have.
Rule #32: You gotta enjoy the little things.