I'm sick. I've got chest congestion and a sore throat, not to mention body aches and sleeplessness. I've been having a weird kind of week, but I was doing my best to keep it together. My whole semester has been strange, and really difficult at times, but because of my wonderful friends, and Sarah, it's been that much easier to do as well.
Only a couple of posts ago, I was talking about my Dad getting sick. I believe they diagnosed it as pneumonia, and he was really quite ill. He appeared to get better, and everything was ok as far as I knew. Yesterday, I got a call from my mom, and she said that she was trying to get in touch with me, that it was important. I check my e-mail, and there is one from her in my inbox. Apparently, they had to take my father to the hospital on Friday. As long as I've been alive, he's never been to the hospital as a patient. This is Zeus getting a cold, this is the Leviathan getting a fever. For me, this is Batman being outsmarted. This shit just doesn't happen. Not to them. My dad has gone through more than anyone else I've ever met, or probably ever will meet. "He's more than a man, but less than a god" at least to me. I've thought that since I was small, and heard it used in "The Sandlot". The kids in that movie use it to describe Babe Ruth. They spoke of him with a mythic reverence that was reserved for men that do things that inspire wonder and respect. My dad did that sort of stuff be accident, or at least it seemed that way. He was probably just being himself. My dad taught me more than anyone else over the course of my life, and now he's got a growth in his lung. His brain is swelling so much that he's lost feeling in his right hand, and can't even use it. He sent me a letter today, with a check in it. He took the time with a numb and useless right hand to make out a check and type a letter with his off hand. I'd say that I was really worried about him, and I hope that he has the strength to make it through this, and I do have that, but it isn't really how I feel. He told me that what is happening with him is one of several things; a viral infection, a bacterial parasite, tuberculosis (yea, that TB, the red death), or cancer. So, I call my mom, and she's putting on her best happy voice like she's really thrilled to hear my voice. She tells me this like it's some goddamn news story. I talk to my dad, and he sounds like himself...but he never really sounds any different on the phone no matter what's going on with him. He tells me all this, and sounds totally cool with it. They're trying to keep me from getting upset, I suppose. I really wish they would just tell me the truth, though. Dad isn't Gyp. If he dies, I don't want to wait a fucking week to find out. Also, none of those things that it could be are really benign. Viral infections, bacterial parasites, cancer, and TB, are not kind or nice ailments. He's 74 years old, getting over a serious chest infection, and I'm pretty sure all of those things could kill him dead. D E A D. Oh well. I'll know tomorrow if its cancer or not. Whatever it is, I hope it doesn't kill my old man. I kinda like the guy, you know?
Only a couple of posts ago, I was talking about my Dad getting sick. I believe they diagnosed it as pneumonia, and he was really quite ill. He appeared to get better, and everything was ok as far as I knew. Yesterday, I got a call from my mom, and she said that she was trying to get in touch with me, that it was important. I check my e-mail, and there is one from her in my inbox. Apparently, they had to take my father to the hospital on Friday. As long as I've been alive, he's never been to the hospital as a patient. This is Zeus getting a cold, this is the Leviathan getting a fever. For me, this is Batman being outsmarted. This shit just doesn't happen. Not to them. My dad has gone through more than anyone else I've ever met, or probably ever will meet. "He's more than a man, but less than a god" at least to me. I've thought that since I was small, and heard it used in "The Sandlot". The kids in that movie use it to describe Babe Ruth. They spoke of him with a mythic reverence that was reserved for men that do things that inspire wonder and respect. My dad did that sort of stuff be accident, or at least it seemed that way. He was probably just being himself. My dad taught me more than anyone else over the course of my life, and now he's got a growth in his lung. His brain is swelling so much that he's lost feeling in his right hand, and can't even use it. He sent me a letter today, with a check in it. He took the time with a numb and useless right hand to make out a check and type a letter with his off hand. I'd say that I was really worried about him, and I hope that he has the strength to make it through this, and I do have that, but it isn't really how I feel. He told me that what is happening with him is one of several things; a viral infection, a bacterial parasite, tuberculosis (yea, that TB, the red death), or cancer. So, I call my mom, and she's putting on her best happy voice like she's really thrilled to hear my voice. She tells me this like it's some goddamn news story. I talk to my dad, and he sounds like himself...but he never really sounds any different on the phone no matter what's going on with him. He tells me all this, and sounds totally cool with it. They're trying to keep me from getting upset, I suppose. I really wish they would just tell me the truth, though. Dad isn't Gyp. If he dies, I don't want to wait a fucking week to find out. Also, none of those things that it could be are really benign. Viral infections, bacterial parasites, cancer, and TB, are not kind or nice ailments. He's 74 years old, getting over a serious chest infection, and I'm pretty sure all of those things could kill him dead. D E A D. Oh well. I'll know tomorrow if its cancer or not. Whatever it is, I hope it doesn't kill my old man. I kinda like the guy, you know?
nolan_void:
I imagine its rough, because I don't like my dad at all and I'm pretty sure I would still be fucked up if he up and died, at least for a little while. I guess its really fortunate that you've had such good experiences with him though. That can never be undone, by anything, and his actions and life will continue through you, no matter what.