Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

machinefuck

Is where the heart is.

Member Since 2009

Followers 151 Following 164

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Tuesday Jan 19, 2010

Jan 19, 2010
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Life as of 1/19/10
---------------------

+I don't think I've ever felt this way about someone before you Magic. How curious that the heart can long for someone whom I have yet to meet. I hope we do soon. Please don't think or feel like I am pressuring you into anything. I know you need time- take as much as you need. Just know that the gravity of how much I care for and about you is immense.

+NAMM was pretty cool. You can check out the videos from it at MECHAMECCA because I'm too lazy to upload all of'em to SG haha.

-My grandfather had another stroke yesterday. It doesn't look good. I kind of feel guilty because I've only met him a couple of times in my life and know that I am probably a lot less upset than my mother is. Or that I would probably be a lot more upset if it were Oma (my grandma) because I've spent my whole life with her. Admitting this makes me feel like a bad person. I am still upset though.

-I wish I could live in the moment. But how is someone who is goal-driven and oriented supposed to do that? I can never tell. Perhaps one day.

-I love music, but sometimes I get a sense of how empty and meaningless what I do is. It's a very frightening thing to feel.

+Today, I shall write my goals of the year. One of which is to truly enjoy, embrace and live through my sexual nature. I feel like most of my life, I have felt guilty about it and tried to ignore it or shove it aside; cease people from knowing that it's such a significant part of my life. Why? The reasons, I feel, are many and ultimately my fault. But not matter how this makes me look or how this sounds, I truly feel like being a member of SG has helped me grow immensely as an individual- especially when embracing this aspect of my identity and self. Thank you.


Though we may have not met, a friend is a friend and I love you all.
J
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
just12345:
i'm tired of sleeping alone too well i have the pup so at least umm i have his little warmness to comfort me but the joy of having my Husband snoring away right beside me and stealing the covers... yeah i very much so missed that frown
Jan 21, 2010
machinefuck:
Tuesdae: I'm pretty good, just sick [aka gluten-allergy]. Been asking myself a lot of questions lately

Barely: Hahaha, fo' sho. I'm excited for it! I think it'll be fun.

Wifer: Why is he not there? Or is this old news and I just have no idea?
Jan 21, 2010

More Blogs

  • 06.19.10
    0

    Saturday Jun 19, 2010

    The good news: I'm moving by or around July 17th. The bad news: My…
  • 06.12.10
    3

    Saturday Jun 12, 2010

    I know I've been quite the stranger around these parts. I'm trying to…
  • 06.03.10
    6

    Friday Jun 04, 2010

    Read More
  • 05.23.10
    9

    Sunday May 23, 2010

    Preview 3 tracks off the new mixtape!! (No DJ Version) http://themach…
  • 05.16.10
    9

    Sunday May 16, 2010

    Read More
  • 05.11.10
    3

    Tuesday May 11, 2010

    http://www.urb.com/2010/05/11/the-machine-passing-the-bar-mixtape-tra…
  • 05.05.10
    6

    Wednesday May 05, 2010

    So what goes into a new musical project for yours truly? Aka w…
  • 05.05.10
    3

    Wednesday May 05, 2010

    Thinking to myself: "Damn, that lady in the market was giving me THE …
  • 05.03.10
    5

    Monday May 03, 2010

    I know I've been neglecting all you guys...don't worry, I'm alive Ju…
  • 04.26.10
    5

    Monday Apr 26, 2010

    Good things have been happening lately. +Old customer kinda a…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
8
months
25
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,123,049 followers
  • 14,912,246 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,371,591 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo