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m_bethany

damned lost angel from venice beach

Member Since 2004

Followers 219 Following 175

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Friday Nov 19, 2004

Nov 19, 2004
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JOURNAL:

Just been listening to music lately.


smile Speaking of which...
One of 5 new additions (Green Day, Sugarcult, the Randies, Pico Train, Colateral Sdtrk, Laurel Canyon Sdtrk, revisiting Bad Religion and The Girl Next Door Sdtrk), hope you like...
************************************************
she's an Extraordinary girl
in an ordinary world
and she cant seem to get away

he lacks the courage in his mind
like a child left behind
like a pet left in the rain

she's all alone again
wiping the tears from her eyes
some days he feels like dying
she gets so sick of crying

she sees the mirror of herself
an image she wants to sell
to anyone willing to buy

he steals the image in her kiss
from her hearts apocalypse
from the one called whatsername

she's all alone again
wiping the tears from her eyes
some days he feels like dying
she gets so sick of crying

she's all alone again
wiping the tears from her eyes
some days he feels like dying
some days it's not worth trying
now that they both are finding
she gets so sick of crying

she's an Extraordinary girl
**************************************************
GREEN DAY, "Extraordinary Girl" off the new album.
It is me. At least the person I was and am trying not to be. whatever I am picking myself up from the crumpled ball in the corner with the bruises and cuts in the broken glass. Fuck that.

Thank you all for your comments, I am going to try and get to them all today since it is my day off and my day home. Yes home. For a little longer.

poopiepants05 is a surprise. Started talking to him on MYSPACE *shut up* and was interesting by email... guess what? His band is what I predict to be the hottest and biggest thing out of Southern California since NO DOUBT and SAVE FERRIS. How they play it from the "hit", we will see soon...

shocked Shocked? That is my prediction. Since the time I last updated and failed horribly to mention the band (a little self-absorbed,.. sorry) they have been played on KROQ. I cannot wait to see it happen....

I want to try and see them on Sunday in Glendale.. I work until 8:15 (at the earliest I get to leave) in MdR at the restaurant then have to drive there... cannot do saturday night - La Boheme (Opera) opens and I have a date to see it Opening Night and then have to work all morning saturday... just a tight schedule....

so tonight? I chill at home. I have a 7am in MdR, an hour from here, in the AM. Have to wake up at 5:30am. tongue BLAH!

But I like it. Regardless, I like the hours in the car, I like the time to think. I love the idea of being away from the house I live in. It frustrates me...

The couple in Silverlake want me. Move in date set for December 22-23 ish for me. biggrin love kiss biggrin YEAH! For Christmas I am giving myself my own rented space that is mine with people I love! Yeah! the wife took me hiking yesterday in the Hollywood Hills by the old "OUTPOST SIGN that used to preside on the opposite side of the hills from the infamous HOLLYWOOD SIGN. The ruins are still there... if you hike up to see the view of the whole city.... through RUNYON CANYON PARK and up the hills steep climb to the ultimate view... the only other one so breathtaking was from my Prince Charming's last house in the Hollywood Hills right above Sunset Strip. Loved that one too for mornings early and overcast. *le sigh* I miss him too.

I have not heard or seen him since the surgery occurred over a month ago, maybe almost two... I am trying not to think about it so much. It hurts that he would not return any of my messages... even as a friend (not that many left.. only one a week allowed it at all). But maybe something I did in the process upset him... I have so many automatic defense mechanisms, who the fuck knows what did what to whom. Not an excuse, just realizing a lot of shit lately.... I did care for him. I wanted him as a partner. I knew he was all I could need. As he was. Just as he was. Nothing different, just let me lay by his side. I did not even want the L word, just the companionship and understanding so I could be affected by his light and luster near me in the positive ways his fleeting visits taunted me with. *deep breath* I loved him, as a companion would in ages and ages of time. I could be his vampire companion - spend ages learning and viewing the world with each other. I wanted that and was ready for it. With him.

Well, then anyway. I guess I COULD be pursuaded that direction with some extension work ... but I am trying to turn the leaf back over and clean up the mess I left to rot in Los Angeles. Time to face it and thrive where I want to be, that city is big enough for all my exs and me *ALL the people I have interacted with on a sexual level... wow*.

Silverlake will be beautiful. I am so lucky. Anyone heard of TANTRA? I am going to try and get a hostess gig there... I do not care how much it pays or how little... I love that place and all I have is time... I will make it work. To serve there would be an awesome experience. Might have to cruise with my now buddy, Echo Park Guy, to some places for dinner just to see where I can get a new waitressing job... oh, did not mention...

frown Sorry, I have not updated in a bit for good reasons.. as is why there is a long entry today. My work is restructuring.. they are trying to get the older people out and get newer younger kids in by cutting sections and making us make half our usual in tips... it sucks basically. SO I am trying to get another waitressing job... if anyone knows anywhere in the Silverlake/Hollywood area looking for very experienced hostess or decently experienced waitress, let me know...

Things are better... always on the up and up. I love to run and hike though. I might go today... after a viewing of the wonderful movie... Schindler's List.

Damn birthday party in Hollywood tonight, my buddy Perry. DAMN. I have to work at 7am. Would he, could he, understand? I do not know... time for the stoney and then a run then lunch. Good deal.

later y'all. Comments to be en route over the next few days... if not today.

Mahalo lovers... *puss puss*
~ the angel* smile
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
apologees:
there are several theories of truth in epistemology. one of the more popular ones (and easiest to defend) is the correspondence theory of truth, according to which truth is nothing more than the correspondance of propositions to a reality, i.e, something is true to the extent that it corresponds to something real. This isn't that great a theory (it leaves much to be desired when it comes to prescriptive actions and ethics) but I think correspondance is generally what people mean when they use the word: it tracks best with common sense.

So, to find the truth is nothing more than to find the best copy of the world.

Word.
Nov 21, 2004
silveronthetree:
Sounds like your busy and I liked all the links in your journal today.

Great news about moving out, in time for xmas.

Lots of love to you

(get your prince charming out of your mind. He was up for some sex is all. You worth more)
Nov 21, 2004

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