m_bethany

JOURNAL:

So I went to class this morning...
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some of you probably didn't know I was a student as well as a number of other things... yeah, I have one full timer, one part timer, and school. BUT I STILL HAVE TIME FOR YOU! so feel special!
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... anyway, that was fun... so I got my term paper back from my teacher along with three tests with scores from the last few weeks. Guess what? The tests were an 80%, 87%, and a 92%! Oh, the big womper: the term paper was an "A". Straight up A on the paper, dude. Oh damn it, I have to brag some more....
"Excellent report on a timely and important electronic media issue. Very thoughtful critical comments. Good Work!"
Not bad for a girl as busy as I am. I have to toot my own horn, it is only because I stopped partying that this accomplishment at school is possible. It has been over a year since my last good semester at college....
(dropped out last semester because I needed time for my coke habit and I had to work.... bad times with bad decisions)
BUT its all good now, things are looking up!

::sigh:: all done with the hard part of the semester! fuck ya!

So that is what my focus has been while the mind sits and waits on the ex situation and my charming prince as well. I only hope things are good on the east coast for my prince (I have decided his name is now "prince" and the ex is "the ex" - TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT AND CORRUPT) and his mother. I have not heard but I keep leaving little messages and texting him. I just want to put a smile on his face when I call or text him, that is all! Soon and very soon I willl see him.....

The ex said "I love you" the other day when I saw him. I do too I guess but I don't know, am I getting ready to move on maybe? He is just so good in bed... fuck! (opps... exactly) We will not make any decisions yet. But soon enough a decision will have to be made anyway.... that will be interesting AND posted here for all to be entertained by.

SMALL REFLECTION: What is the trend lately with the mini motorcycles that are like pint sized but painted to be like ducati's and all that shit? I don't get it but my roomie is so obsessed, he wants a fleet of them. Man, if only I had invented the razor scooter, I could just finish my education without splitting my time between school and working 7 days a week and I could be finished with my education by summer! Bastards, I only wish.... but it makes me stronger and appreciate it more on the other hand.... (sarcaism)cuz I need to be stronger....

I am having some turmoil inside if y'all can't tell. I have a love life that is forever changing on a day to day basis but my life otherwise is slowly feeling more and more stable. Now if only I could motivate myself to go to the gym more than once a week.... working on it.
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"Then you came along,
I gave you everything but then you wanted more........
Now I'm free from what you want
Now I'm free from what you need
Now I'm free from what you are"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Audioslave, "What You Are"

One of my favorites. So in the end, the angel* has her "ideal ex", the prince charming, and then the brutally hot really close to almost slightly incestuous best friend. All of which have her in a tizzy - does she react or wait for a reaction?

I am a waiting kind of girl.

Lesson #12 - When in doubt, let them make the first move. This way you can make a better educated decision by the information you have gathered with whatever they betray about themselves in THEIR move.
** Now if you don't get that one, I apologize. You gots to be knowing to get that one, it's like a trade reference or some shit**

mahalo!
~ the angel*