It is kind of sick but even though I'm trying to endure the pain of a rapid series of heartbreaks.. Since I'm in love with a woman who is apparently trolling me.. I'm calm.. Relatively. I'm smiling. There's almost a bliss in the sustained and amazing pain of heartbreak. Retreating inward is like finally.. I might be free.. But i keep looking back, maybe there's something left i could salvage, and there's just scathing fire falling from the skies. Why did i bother. Even cutting ties on social networks would mean more looking back.. More searing slashes.
For clarity of course i would endure the flames like the fool that i am because she said she liked me. I doubt she still does but.. Fuck it.. I'm so badly in need of anything i can get I'll endure being burned to ash.