so in the book 'a million little pieces'  the guy is tormented by what he calls 'the fury'......its fitting for the enormous rage that overtakes him, and controls him, and his actions.  
i was thinking about my own. and mine is not the fury. i feel rage, but rage is not the overpowering element of evil within me.
mine shall be called henceforth - the sabatoger.
at every beck and turn, it likes to self destruct me. self sabotage any step forward, any chance to have something to show for myself. i haven't decided if it is a female or a male character within me.
it feels good to give it a fucking name.
out of me damn sabatoger out
  out
    
  i was thinking about my own. and mine is not the fury. i feel rage, but rage is not the overpowering element of evil within me.
mine shall be called henceforth - the sabatoger.
at every beck and turn, it likes to self destruct me. self sabotage any step forward, any chance to have something to show for myself. i haven't decided if it is a female or a male character within me.
it feels good to give it a fucking name.
out of me damn sabatoger
 out
  out
      endquire:
      
      
      
    
  I will do absolutely everything I can to help you purge yourself of this demon. I know this demon all to well. You are too great and your potential is too important to let this keep you from being what you deserve to be. I wish I was able to do more. I wish I was closer. it would be far easier to help you in person. I will make the most of what I have. Who you are and what you have to share are beautiful beyond description. You already know that i have pledged myself to your aide. I just want to remind you. I am on your side. I am in your corner. Whatever you will ever face it will not be alone. I will always be at your service to face whatever you must with you. I will not let you fail. 
      furious1:
      
      
      
    
  Blah--I got a BAD case of contempt.  but I feel good about it. Either I'll do somthin, or I'll pay. right now i'll pay. (everything costs theory)  
 
