lucky1336929

i found out a couple of nights ago that me and my sister might have to put my dad into a care facility because his mind is so messed up from his blood sugar imbalance (diabetes) that hes having trouble taking care of himself. also, carrie (my sister) and her husband, andy, had to put their dog sophie to sleep. she was a 12 year old Newfoundland, which is really old for that breed, and she was having trouble walking and even had some cancerous tumors. i was very sad that night.
me and my dad have had our problems over the years, but the worse his health gets and the older he gets, the more i realize he probably isnt going to be around too much longer. and even with all we've been through, i love him and i'll miss him when he's gone. i dont want to have to put him in a home, but if he cant take care of himself and his health is in danger, it might be the best thing for him. plus, he'd get to tell stories about the marines with the other vets because its a V.A. home.
i remember when i was little i thought my dad was the strongest man in the world, so its weird now seeing him get frail and having his mind screwed up because of the diabetes. it makes my heart hurt and it makes me feel guilty for all the mean things i thought about him after my parents got divorced.
i know i cant go back and undo the past, all i can do is try to do my best with right now. so i will.