lostidentity

I had a serious issue at work Friday. My boss pulled me to the side and said "I'm very concerned about the job you're doing...." Earlier in that day, someone else had brought something to my boss's attention "uh, he screwed this up!" and I was asked about it......turns out, the other person had 'thought' I messed up, when I didn't. The bottom line is, I catch on pretty slowly, but I do catch on. The main concern, which is legitimate, is my organization. It all starts with my little apartment here. Laziness seems to get the best of me many times. And its so frustrating because I sit here home alone begging myself to go out for a walk, and thats about it. I just sit there and close my eyes and just sit there. I know whats best for me, but I don't seem to do anything about it. Any cures for laziness? So, therefore, I now have the added pressure of knowing every move I make, is going to be analyzed. I hope I can make it till June. I want to move far away.......to another dreamland and see if maybe I can be inspired by a different surrounding. I have a few 'ideal' places I would like to move: 1) California- That's always been the ultimate for me. Just something about the place gives me very calm winds emotionally. 2) Vegas- hot chicks, hot weather, and a hot atmosphere, I've never been there, so maybe I'm horribly mistaken about that place. 3) Arizona, don't know too much about that place which makes it even more compelling. 4) Vancouver- I've never been there either. It just gives me calm vibes though....???? 5) probably the second most wanted on my list would be to go live in Europe. Its where my roots begin, but I just don't know if it would be a good move economically speaking.

Oh well, I'll find out I guess. For right now, I'm going to an ATM and then headed for Atlantic City, and lose some money just for the hell of it I guess...lol....I know, you want to kill me...