I need to floss my teeth. My gums are like dying for it. I think my new job of sitting in a chair has helped me gain weight as around five I was faxing some stuff, when I had to bend down and fix something with the toner cartridge, when I heard a **RRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP** Thankfully, it was five and most people were leaving and I hope no one noticed, but it was funny.
Well, the parents are gone
I really enjoyed my time with them. They helped me out a lot, bought me a lot of things that I needed. I also lost a lot of money down in Atlantic City.
So hence, the empty feeling again. Fuck, what do you do about that? I think I will get to the point of breakdown and actually do something about it. The question is, when is that point? My hermit-like lifestyle has caused me to tolerate somethings that generally speaking, people don't do. Things like sitting in the dark with eyes wide open, or just staring at something for more than a minute. You know, this journal thing has really been very helpful for me.
As far as the Greek girl goes, its kinda on hold...well, I use the word hold for lack of a better term. We got the first meeting out of the way which was cool, and have agreed to go out again, its just a matter of when. My parents were here, so that kind of ruled anything like that out and her last week of school is this week, so we agreed to get together sometime over the weekend. I'm really glad that she is still communicating with me. Its not like I have this strongly in love feeling, but it just makes me feel better getting a text or phone call when not expecting it. My god this woman is downright gorgeous! Smooth is the first thing that came to my mind. You know, I was thinking, I am really not feeling these feelings of "I'm too ugly" anymore. I mean, if someone likes you, then accept it. I guess some people, even including myself up to a certain point in life, just wanted to be the society standard when it comes to beauty, therefore, when someone says "I think you're cute" and that person is not a supermodel, they disregard comments like that. I've really learned that it is possable for someone to like me, even though my self image isn't the best.
Well, the parents are gone
I really enjoyed my time with them. They helped me out a lot, bought me a lot of things that I needed. I also lost a lot of money down in Atlantic City.
So hence, the empty feeling again. Fuck, what do you do about that? I think I will get to the point of breakdown and actually do something about it. The question is, when is that point? My hermit-like lifestyle has caused me to tolerate somethings that generally speaking, people don't do. Things like sitting in the dark with eyes wide open, or just staring at something for more than a minute. You know, this journal thing has really been very helpful for me.
As far as the Greek girl goes, its kinda on hold...well, I use the word hold for lack of a better term. We got the first meeting out of the way which was cool, and have agreed to go out again, its just a matter of when. My parents were here, so that kind of ruled anything like that out and her last week of school is this week, so we agreed to get together sometime over the weekend. I'm really glad that she is still communicating with me. Its not like I have this strongly in love feeling, but it just makes me feel better getting a text or phone call when not expecting it. My god this woman is downright gorgeous! Smooth is the first thing that came to my mind. You know, I was thinking, I am really not feeling these feelings of "I'm too ugly" anymore. I mean, if someone likes you, then accept it. I guess some people, even including myself up to a certain point in life, just wanted to be the society standard when it comes to beauty, therefore, when someone says "I think you're cute" and that person is not a supermodel, they disregard comments like that. I've really learned that it is possable for someone to like me, even though my self image isn't the best.
@least better than for the Devils.
-TM