my fight with depression is killing me. it is becoming more and more difficult to find ways to keep myself in a good mood. it always seems like i am being ignored and neglected by my friends. i am now finding myself wishing Nikki and i never got serious with eachother because we no longer talk like we did before and i feel like i fucked up a good friendship.
i am soo confused about what i want. i am afraid to look for another serious relationship because of the potential to get hurt again, but at the same time i am soo incredibly lonely.
my emotions are tearing me apart, and when i go out to go to work or where ever' i have to put on my happy act and i hate it, i just want to be happy again for real.
i went shooting today and my ears have been ringing for the past 5 or 6, and i am very sensitive to sounds now and my eaqualibrium is a bit off which is not helping my mood, i feel drunk
i know that nobody really reads this, or cares about me , but seeing as none of my friends have time for me, this is the closest i can get to talking to some one, so yeah, whatever
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So, what is your way to deal with pain?