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longblackbangs

Auburn, CA

Member Since 2003

Followers 20 Following 16

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Thursday Feb 24, 2005

Feb 24, 2005
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I guess there is not too much to say these days that doesn't sound like the ol' 'whoa is me', but I felt like writing so here it goes.

and the story goes: I don't know what it is, but as of last weekend it just feels like something broke. There was always "something right" that was at least countering the "something wrong" but that balance sort of packed its bags. Now it's just been replaced by constant sick and anxious feeling that starts in my stomach and is filtering through my head. I'm not sure about much of anything and the wierd thing is I lost the motivation to try and figure it out. At this point I'm realizing I should have been less bold and maybe thought twice about leaving myself out here alone, with a rapidly confused state of what I want to work towards with my life and worsening chronic knee pain that rules out alot of decisions for me.

Other than that here's whats on Billy's platter of "things to keep my mind from drifting to unwanted topics".

-Having a hell of a time trying to deal with the DSL company to get the line set up. They tried to set it up the other day (after numerous calls to remind them) and now the freakin' phone line doesn't even work at all. They got to come look at it tommorow they say. It's costing way more money than anything like this should!

-Changing my major to Liberal Studies. Realized I can apply stuff I've taken in the past that I otherwise thought were lost units to this major and may possibly get out of school before I am 30. And in that time I will be able to take some classes that are semi interesting again (Art! Literature! love ) I found this out when I got online to drop out of school completely the other day.

-Am looking into going to bartending school while I have a little free time this semester. Who knows if I will ever use it when I get done with the course...but hey. (Any suggestions of cheap yet decent ones?!?!)

-Looking forward to going to visit Antonio Diaz (greatest kid in the fucking world!) in Brooklyn for a week over spring break next month.

-Hoping to get off my ass and go out to catch at least one show during Noise Pop.

-Get my act together and start screenprinting. Lord know I need something more to show for my time here besides an unhealthy music collection, pay-stubs, and photographs I used to take when I thought I had a creative eye for it.

Okay, enough melodrama.

...it goes on and on and on and on it's going on and on and on and on and on and oooonnn.

It's a shocking bit of footage viewed from a shitty TV screen.
You can squint through snowy static to make out the meaning.
Just keep on stretching the antennae, hoping that it will come clear...
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
kelland:
I wish I could fix what is broken.

I feel SAD that I was not arround for your proposed date on Yahoo. NO!

frown frown frown
Feb 26, 2005
captaincrass:
I got all caught up on this thing they call "my.......Space" (stolen sarcasm) It was all bright and colorfull in the beginning. everyone wants to be your friend and give their cute little 2cents and shallow witty remarks. I think the whole town of every town is on that thing. It has to be a conspiracy.I like it here where i can hide out and talk shit on everyone or expess myself in a world without the distraction of fellings and color. myspace is fake. I think I'm going to post some of my innapropriate/darker sg entrys on there and shake it up a little bit. thanks Billy, for this little box on your comment space for me to express my disturbance semi publicly. puke on myspace
Feb 27, 2005

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