longblackbangs

so i finally get home from being out of town and what do i find sitting on a pile of my shirts? give up? a paralzed rat. yeah its still alive but its back is completely turned the wrong way and it is sitting in a pile of its own poo-poo. the cat in my household (notice how i don't say "my cat" because this is exactly the reason i am not a fan of domesticated cats. they just kill shit for the fun if it with no intention of eating it. I mean if she is gonna do that why not attack a person... i mean i would at least have a little respect if she tried to take me out in my sleep) decided to leave me a welcome back present and instead of killing it all the way forced me to make the decision. I think the cat understands im vegan and is doing a little phycological test to see how i handled this (god damn cat). I eventually found someone to "finish the job" but for some reason still felt like shit. Im thinking that something out there wants me to kill something and if anything i would feel more comfertable if that something was a someone. I think that someone would be me if anything/anyone.

That and my knee is killing me constatly. feels like it is gonna go one way and the knee cap the other.

I have two large chemistry and biology tests in the next 2 days.

i haven't seen any of my friends in the past 5 days

i had a family "get together" and was constantly reminded how im a nutty kid that needs to grow up and accept the world how it is and that things "arn't really that bad and that as i get older will realize that life is okay". I felt this way for as long as i can remember and im 22 now. the only fucking way that things will seem okay is if i give in and become just another scumbag like the rest of the modern world.

other than that things are going great