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longblackbangs

Auburn, CA

Member Since 2003

Followers 20 Following 16

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Wednesday Sep 10, 2003

Sep 10, 2003
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sitting around, no work today
try pacing to keep awake
laying around, no school today
just drink until the clock has circled all the way
it is late afternoon
as you walk through the rooms
of a house that is quiet
except for unanswered telephones
you stand near the sink
while you're mixing a drink
you think you don't want to pass out
where your roommates will find you again
stumble around the neighborhood with nothing to do
you're always looking for something
to sniff, smoke, or swallow
calling over next door to see what they got
but you would settle for anything
that would make your brain slow down or stop
break this circle of thoughts you chase
before the catch back up with you
and your parents noticied your thinning face,
all the weight you lost
all the weight you are losing
you said, "i'm done feeling like a skeleton
no more sleep walking dead"
you're going to wake from this coma
you're going to crawl from this bed you have made
and stop counting on that camera
that hangs round your neck
because it won't ever remember
what you choose to forget
as you try to find some source of light
try to name one thing you like
you used to have such a longer list
and light you never had to look for it
but now it's so easy to second guess everything you do
until all you want is to finish this half empty glass
before the ice melts away
this feeling used to pass
but seems like it's every day and every night now

-a line allows progress, a circle does not-
by my heterosexual crush, Mr Conor Oberst...

I got the Bright Eyes vinyle box set the other day but have pretty much just been wearing out that track. I don't think I could describe the way I've been feeling any better than that.

p.s. i want to kiss the girl in my chemistry class. She could easily be a suicide girl, she would easily be in my top three, and she is my lab partner...I never thought i would ever be looking forward to going to my chem. lab... love
shorteyes:
Lets not forget to give credit to the other half of that song, Mr. Joe Knapp of Son Ambulance but I don't know how much of it he wrote, if any, but I wanted to sound cool in this post so I had to throw out some obscure musical fact. You should give the chem. girl a dead rose in a beaker (don't think I spelled that right).
Sep 14, 2003

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