today i read on a friends msn "one year missing you...and the same loneliness of always". she lost her mom one year ago and she has always been a lonely person - from the countryside, living in the biggest city of this country. like me.
first i judged her in my head. i though "what the fuck is she complaining about. she just have a good bf now, is earning more at work, why is she like that?"
then i thought better and i realised i was being such a bitch because i have my friends and my job and
i feel terribly lonely sometimes, maybe (at least) once every day.
in these lonely times, like i am now, i wonder ... maybe i need to be lonely every day... maybe this is mental cleaning...maybe this is when i can really stop and live a little apart from daily chaos...think why did i eat that whole jewish bread. was it so good? yeah, it was.
first i judged her in my head. i though "what the fuck is she complaining about. she just have a good bf now, is earning more at work, why is she like that?"
then i thought better and i realised i was being such a bitch because i have my friends and my job and
i feel terribly lonely sometimes, maybe (at least) once every day.
in these lonely times, like i am now, i wonder ... maybe i need to be lonely every day... maybe this is mental cleaning...maybe this is when i can really stop and live a little apart from daily chaos...think why did i eat that whole jewish bread. was it so good? yeah, it was.
evilmonkeymuffin:
I love those unwanted moments of self realization. They are as you describe, the broom of the soul.
