It's just sinking in for me how difficult things will be for the next year if I decide to be with H--. I mean, things will be really, really difficult. For both of us. What will be the amount of time over the course of that year that I actually see him? Probably two weeks maximum. How will my family react if I choose to leave? How will my family have a chance to meet him? I feel like when he comes to NYC on his next vacation, we can figure things out in person-- but that might also be the only opportunity for my parents to meet him.
To add to that, there's my job and financial situation. I am relying on my parents. Again. I will have to look for an office job. It makes me very sad that I live in a place that appreciates teachers so little. As a teaching fellow at my university, I make poverty-level money. As a teacher at the ESL school, I get paid per lesson, and I don't get very many lessons.
I know that teaching English in Japan I would make significantly more money. For me, significantly more money just means enough to pay my rent. I don't have unreasonable expectations.
My life is going to change. A lot. I have to be ready, even though I can't know exactly what will happen.
To add to that, there's my job and financial situation. I am relying on my parents. Again. I will have to look for an office job. It makes me very sad that I live in a place that appreciates teachers so little. As a teaching fellow at my university, I make poverty-level money. As a teacher at the ESL school, I get paid per lesson, and I don't get very many lessons.
I know that teaching English in Japan I would make significantly more money. For me, significantly more money just means enough to pay my rent. I don't have unreasonable expectations.
My life is going to change. A lot. I have to be ready, even though I can't know exactly what will happen.
hooeylewis:
I hjave ahistory of nagging knee troubles. I have had enough knee pain over the past 2 weeks to be concerned. Thankfully it was nothing major.