Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

lokischild

hometown, usa

Member Since 2005

Followers 54 Following 69

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday Apr 29, 2006

Apr 29, 2006
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
listening to Ani DiFranco
yeah. i've been kind of scarce lately. mostly busy babysitting my sister, but she goes back home on tuesday. i love her dearly, but we function best as sisters with at least 2 hours travel in between us. these past couple weeks have convinced me that as soon as possible i need to get an apartment, with as few roomates as possible.
but i guess when i surround myself with extroverts i can't really expect them to understand that i need time to myself. it's just so damn tiring to have to put my 'public' face on. i'm not fake or anything, but socializing doesn't really come natural to me. i have to try at it. and it gets very tiring to have to constantly be on for my sister and for work and for my mom and my family, etc.
so i guess a weekend alone is a good thing for me. a chance to recharge my batteries. the problem is i don't count alone as 'alone' anymore. when i say alone, i mean, in the company of my lover. i find him soothing. but he decided that he needed a weekend back at his parents. i kind of see it as a weekend away from me, especially since this is the first weekend i've had off in a while. and it hurts to think of it like that, but i can't see it any other way.
i seem to have a real problem with self perception. apparently it's horridly warped, but i can't tell. to me, everyone else seems crazy, blind, or lying. i look in the mirror, and what i see doesn't jibe with what other people are saying. i am told about all these qualities i have that i've never seen. i'm just lost when i'm presented with what seems to be a reflection of myself. maybe i'm more over due for a weekend alone than i thought.
or maybe i just need to quit it with these pointless conversations with myself.
EL SUICIDO LOCO
-=squish=-

p.s. at some point i'll stop being sappy and annoying. possibly. we'll see.
loslope:
the internal dialogue is helpful. Don't quit! smile
May 7, 2006

More Blogs

  • 09.16.06
    4

    Saturday Sep 16, 2006

    listening to a lawnmower i have been a bad, bad lokischild. i have…
  • 08.27.06
    7

    Sunday Aug 27, 2006

    listening to flyleaf i would love to just pick up and move to new ha…
  • 08.26.06
    0

    Saturday Aug 26, 2006

    Read More
  • 08.18.06
    4

    Friday Aug 18, 2006

    listening to the helicopter flying by. why do people just hang up wh…
  • 07.20.06
    6

    Thursday Jul 20, 2006

    listening to disturbed so. some shit's been going down. we got a ne…
  • 07.12.06
    6

    Wednesday Jul 12, 2006

    listening to rain so there was this super awesome torrential downpou…
  • 07.01.06
    6

    Saturday Jul 01, 2006

    listening to the killers so this past week i haven't been on the comp…
  • 06.24.06
    0

    Saturday Jun 24, 2006

    listening to snoring so i just got back from florida thursday night.…
  • 06.13.06
    6

    Tuesday Jun 13, 2006

    listening to sirens so. i don't obsessively go on SG for a few days,…
  • 06.04.06
    9

    Sunday Jun 04, 2006

    listening to sublime oh man. wake and bake. fuckin' right. HA! e…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
11
months
19
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,608 SuicideGirls
  • 0 followers
  • 14,963,251 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,499,181 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo