liziefer

I'm at the top of the world, with lungs exploding from lack of oxygen. I'm gaining altitude, getting colder, freezing as the seconds go by.

I totally ballsed things up with Boy A. The one I saw lots, + really liked. Because I pulled Boy C [Boy B isn't important anymore], + then messed my own head up, or something. Now, I'm stuck with an infatuation for Boy C that I just wish would go away.
To be fair, Boy A pretty much told me that he wanted to be single so he didn't have to think about anyone else's feelings + that he was fucking off travelling sometime this year. * sigh * Guess I still didn't have to go spend the night with Boy C though. Despite him being fitt.
I'm just trouble all round really.
+ now BookFase isn't working so I can't mail Boy C to ask for my belt + buckle back. Gggrr.
I'm also ill, which I'm sure doesn't help matters.

+ the ground swells up below me, crashing in to me, splintering my diamond heart. Shards fly off in directions, I wonder if I can piece them back together, my jigsaw heart.

.....


It's 1am, past the witching hour, + I'm drunk on my own. The gin's gone, there's none left. I left your neck + my heart bruised, I'm lost in a valley of smoke + there's no light, no guidance, only confusion, no answers + no understanding. Cold looks + questions. There's noone to warm my hands tonight, there's noone, noone. Blackcurrant nails + a bruised heart. Lend me your compass, I desire the North + cold, freeze my heart for noone's using it. Lend me your compass, I need to get my bearings. Lend me your compass, I don't know which way I should be pointed. There's no lighthouse for my ship. I'm lost, oh so lost.


Whoever said things look better in the daylight was wrong.
x x x