littleredwriter

....ok...another day i could not muster enough energy to stay overtime at work. all i wanted to do was to come home, have a glass of wine and browse on SG...shit, am i an addict?
anyway, i had the little bit of red wine that was left and i want more...do i open a bottle???? hmmm...excuse me for just a moment..........................................ok, no...i don't have another bottle of charles shaw left...or do i?.....................................damn, no but i do have a nice bottle of 1998 cab....nah...think i'll save that one. so, just feeling a bit blue. it's so funny that for months i've been on this incredible high. i was getting so much encouragement about Go Ask Ogre and i was getting to know someone really amazing and all was right with the world. everything is still very good, just a minor set back of course but i'm saddened at the loss of a friendship. i just really didn't expect to be hurt this way. i've never in my life been in the position where knowing me might benefit someone because of who i know...really it's so minor. i hope i don't become some bitter and cold person who is unable to trust anyone. that would be so sad. no...i won't let that happen. why do i hold on? why do i torture myself with memories? seriously, it's like some sort of illness, i like obsess on a little fucking moment like this idiot guy telling me that i brought the sun when i went to visit him...what is that? neurosis? words that took less than a minute to say and i swear i will obsess...it's silly, i'm laughing now. i think i will take O's advice and give fiction a shot. i'm going to base it on my current situation. yes, that's what i shall do.

slap lekker.
j