As you've noticed I've changed my status to "Cheater". I'm not necessarily a cheater, but I'm not exactly monogamous, either. I'm in a relationship in which I'm not entirely happy in...and I don't know what to do. I think it's that whole "I'm only happy when it rains" idea. It's always misery, that's all I want and I never want to be happy when I am.
You see, I'm an Iraqi war veteran who was in the Army for five years and got out recently for a medical problem. I was in Iraq in 2005 when I was nineteen, and I hated it. I felt like a complete stranger to everyone and couldn't relate to the people there and couldn't quite believe in what I was doing...I tried but it didn't work out and I lost myself in the depression. I tried to save myself numerous times thereafter but now it's like I'm living that fucking NIN song, "Into the Void"....
Tried to save myself but my self keeps slipping away...
And that's where the unhappiness comes in. I got out of the Army the 2nd of February, went on a date when I got back to my hometown, then immediately thought I was in love and wanted nobody but him...and now I'm wondering why I didn't take a look around at my options. I mean, I'm happy because he's a great guy with an awesome job, he likes going to the shop and getting tattoos with me, but he also controls things in my life that I don't want him to. He actually had the audacity to tell me that he will not go into public with me if I'm wearing leggings, arm warmers, leg warmers, ballet flats or my precious teal Uggs that I gave to my sister because of him. And of course this all came about after I moved in with him to his house, which seemed like a great option because I wanted to feel domestic.
I guess the whole reason for feeling this way is because...well...is because of my own stupidity. Love does this to people sometimes, right?
I'm just not totally happy and totally not sure what to do. Help?
You see, I'm an Iraqi war veteran who was in the Army for five years and got out recently for a medical problem. I was in Iraq in 2005 when I was nineteen, and I hated it. I felt like a complete stranger to everyone and couldn't relate to the people there and couldn't quite believe in what I was doing...I tried but it didn't work out and I lost myself in the depression. I tried to save myself numerous times thereafter but now it's like I'm living that fucking NIN song, "Into the Void"....
Tried to save myself but my self keeps slipping away...
And that's where the unhappiness comes in. I got out of the Army the 2nd of February, went on a date when I got back to my hometown, then immediately thought I was in love and wanted nobody but him...and now I'm wondering why I didn't take a look around at my options. I mean, I'm happy because he's a great guy with an awesome job, he likes going to the shop and getting tattoos with me, but he also controls things in my life that I don't want him to. He actually had the audacity to tell me that he will not go into public with me if I'm wearing leggings, arm warmers, leg warmers, ballet flats or my precious teal Uggs that I gave to my sister because of him. And of course this all came about after I moved in with him to his house, which seemed like a great option because I wanted to feel domestic.
I guess the whole reason for feeling this way is because...well...is because of my own stupidity. Love does this to people sometimes, right?
I'm just not totally happy and totally not sure what to do. Help?
I have only been in one relationship and it has been the best five years of my entire life (and still going!) but I think you gotta sit him down and let him know how you feel. Maybe he doesn't understand how his actions are affecting you. Why the hell does he care what you are wearing anyway? That's not important, the important thing to him should be that you are happy and that you can be comfortable with him and be yourself.