Wow, I have had a very long and crazy weekend. Me and my girlfriend of the last three years broke up on Friday 
and really I dont know how to handle this kind of thing. She is the one who broke it off with me and of course I have a hard time letting go. It continues with me freaking out all that night all the next night and all the next day due to different reasons... mostly the fear and pain of the unknown additionally due to the fact that my best friend of the past 7 years spent almost every hour with her... my heart was breaking twice so I confronted her yesterday and could not contain myself on the issue, I broke down. I feel from my high horse of logic for the first time in many years and tears flowed from my bloodshot eyes for what felt like hours. All I could tell her was the I was so sorry for how I felt and if I had the opportunity to wish it all away I would but I can never do that. I cannot stop the pain it will only subside with time. In my teary state I sobbed please... not so soon, just not so soon. She began to cry and begged my forgiveness as well for she never wanted to hurt me. Under most cases I would find the bullshit in that statement, but I looked in her eyes and saw the pain that she was trying to convey. We stared into each others eyes for what felt like an eternity and I held it in hoping it would last... then I told her we can never see each other again and I kissed her long and hard, a kiss only to be matched by the very first time our lips touched. She kissed back as tears ran and found their way into our mouths. The kiss slowed and I knew the truth. I still was in love with her. But she not with me. All I could muster at that point was weak goodbye...and I left.
I have never felt so much pain in my life as I feel at this moment knowing that I will never smell her, hold her, feel her warm breath on my back as we sleep, sit next to her as she sings journey at the top of her lungs in the car.
This sucks ass
and really I dont know how to handle this kind of thing. She is the one who broke it off with me and of course I have a hard time letting go. It continues with me freaking out all that night all the next night and all the next day due to different reasons... mostly the fear and pain of the unknown additionally due to the fact that my best friend of the past 7 years spent almost every hour with her... my heart was breaking twice so I confronted her yesterday and could not contain myself on the issue, I broke down. I feel from my high horse of logic for the first time in many years and tears flowed from my bloodshot eyes for what felt like hours. All I could tell her was the I was so sorry for how I felt and if I had the opportunity to wish it all away I would but I can never do that. I cannot stop the pain it will only subside with time. In my teary state I sobbed please... not so soon, just not so soon. She began to cry and begged my forgiveness as well for she never wanted to hurt me. Under most cases I would find the bullshit in that statement, but I looked in her eyes and saw the pain that she was trying to convey. We stared into each others eyes for what felt like an eternity and I held it in hoping it would last... then I told her we can never see each other again and I kissed her long and hard, a kiss only to be matched by the very first time our lips touched. She kissed back as tears ran and found their way into our mouths. The kiss slowed and I knew the truth. I still was in love with her. But she not with me. All I could muster at that point was weak goodbye...and I left.
I have never felt so much pain in my life as I feel at this moment knowing that I will never smell her, hold her, feel her warm breath on my back as we sleep, sit next to her as she sings journey at the top of her lungs in the car.
This sucks ass
Wait . . . was your friend and her having an affair?