linux

Here I have some Chuck Norris Facts. Please do make is a point to remember that these are indeed facts.

1 Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

2 Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.

3 When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

4 Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

5 Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

6 If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

7 Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

8 Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"

9 In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

10 Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

11 Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

12 Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

13 Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse-kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.


if you would like to read more click here