Sharknado (DVD) Review
Starring: Tara Reid (April); Ian Ziering (Fin); Jaason Simmons (Baz); Cassie Scerbo (Nova)
Written By: Thunder Levin
Directed By: Anthony Ferrante
Grade: F
Ok, so I was going to do an actual theatrical release movie review this time, but only a cursory glance at the current movie timetables proffered up such gems as The Family (remember way back when Robert De Niros participation in a movie was a decent sign it would be good?), Riddick (the second unasked for sequel to Pitch Black), and Insidious: Chapter 2 (which is not, unfortunately, a horror movie version of Neil Simons play). So, since I couldnt in good conscience shell out ten bucks to see any of those flicks, I instead went to Target and shelled out ten bucks to buy the DVD of Sharknado.
Sharknado is one of those SyFy Channel movies that come out every few months or so. Usually they have words like mega or giant or optolis somewhere in the title, and they usually star C-listers like Lou Diamond Phillips as a sherrif and/or Debbie Gibson as a nuclear biologist or something. In any case, theres usually some environmentally-created animal monster hybrid that is rendered in special effects that are even beneath iMovie level that wreaks havoc. These movies tend to be very campy and, I think, are only enjoyable because theyre so bad. To me, watching a movie that is so bad its good is only workable if the movie is trying to be good and doesnt know its bad (like Valley Of The Dolls or Mommie Dearest). When you watch a movie that is intentionally so bad its good that seems like cheating.
So then, Sharknado hits on all the notes of the previous films in the genre. C-List stars? Tara Reid (who once, long, long ago made movies with the Coen Brothers and Robert Altman) and Ian Ziering (from 90210, but since he went to William Paterson College like me, I will go easy on himalumni rep-ruh-sent!). Check. Environmentally-created animal monster hybrid? Well, theres a giant storm that at one point a newscaster says is due to global warming. Check. Bad special effects? Yep. There is not one convincing shot of a shark in this film (I defy anyone ever again to say that the shark in Jaws looks fake). Check. Basically this is a movie with lots of floods, tornados, and sharks. I cannot remember (and I only just watched this) one single special effect that was even approaching passable.
The story is non-existent (I almost give it a pass for not trying to be all plotty), the acting is pretty horrid (Tara Reid, faced with a giant storm that is literally causing sharks to fall from the sky and eat people, seems, at best, mildly perturbed), the special effects are (it cannot be stressed enough) worse than the cheesiest 1970s television chroma key effect. So, why then was this a (admittedly short-lived) phenomenon? I cannot say. This is no better (or worse, or stupider) than any of the other movies in the SyFy canon (when theyre not showing Waterworld for the umpteenth time, that is). Yet this one actually got a theatrical release (which did quite well) and a sequel is already on the way. The hype might make you say Hey, this will be fun to watch. Its not. Avoid this. Go on imdb and look at the top 100 movies and watch one of the films youve never seen instead. Chances are youll have a better time watching an intentionally good movie than one that doesnt even try hard enough to be good garbage. Not to get on a soapbox, but really. Plus, you can watch all of Ingmar Bergmans movies and never once see Ian Zierning get swallowed by a shark and then chainsaw his way out. That, by the way, sounds way more awesome than it actually is.
Starring: Tara Reid (April); Ian Ziering (Fin); Jaason Simmons (Baz); Cassie Scerbo (Nova)
Written By: Thunder Levin
Directed By: Anthony Ferrante
Grade: F
Ok, so I was going to do an actual theatrical release movie review this time, but only a cursory glance at the current movie timetables proffered up such gems as The Family (remember way back when Robert De Niros participation in a movie was a decent sign it would be good?), Riddick (the second unasked for sequel to Pitch Black), and Insidious: Chapter 2 (which is not, unfortunately, a horror movie version of Neil Simons play). So, since I couldnt in good conscience shell out ten bucks to see any of those flicks, I instead went to Target and shelled out ten bucks to buy the DVD of Sharknado.
Sharknado is one of those SyFy Channel movies that come out every few months or so. Usually they have words like mega or giant or optolis somewhere in the title, and they usually star C-listers like Lou Diamond Phillips as a sherrif and/or Debbie Gibson as a nuclear biologist or something. In any case, theres usually some environmentally-created animal monster hybrid that is rendered in special effects that are even beneath iMovie level that wreaks havoc. These movies tend to be very campy and, I think, are only enjoyable because theyre so bad. To me, watching a movie that is so bad its good is only workable if the movie is trying to be good and doesnt know its bad (like Valley Of The Dolls or Mommie Dearest). When you watch a movie that is intentionally so bad its good that seems like cheating.
So then, Sharknado hits on all the notes of the previous films in the genre. C-List stars? Tara Reid (who once, long, long ago made movies with the Coen Brothers and Robert Altman) and Ian Ziering (from 90210, but since he went to William Paterson College like me, I will go easy on himalumni rep-ruh-sent!). Check. Environmentally-created animal monster hybrid? Well, theres a giant storm that at one point a newscaster says is due to global warming. Check. Bad special effects? Yep. There is not one convincing shot of a shark in this film (I defy anyone ever again to say that the shark in Jaws looks fake). Check. Basically this is a movie with lots of floods, tornados, and sharks. I cannot remember (and I only just watched this) one single special effect that was even approaching passable.
The story is non-existent (I almost give it a pass for not trying to be all plotty), the acting is pretty horrid (Tara Reid, faced with a giant storm that is literally causing sharks to fall from the sky and eat people, seems, at best, mildly perturbed), the special effects are (it cannot be stressed enough) worse than the cheesiest 1970s television chroma key effect. So, why then was this a (admittedly short-lived) phenomenon? I cannot say. This is no better (or worse, or stupider) than any of the other movies in the SyFy canon (when theyre not showing Waterworld for the umpteenth time, that is). Yet this one actually got a theatrical release (which did quite well) and a sequel is already on the way. The hype might make you say Hey, this will be fun to watch. Its not. Avoid this. Go on imdb and look at the top 100 movies and watch one of the films youve never seen instead. Chances are youll have a better time watching an intentionally good movie than one that doesnt even try hard enough to be good garbage. Not to get on a soapbox, but really. Plus, you can watch all of Ingmar Bergmans movies and never once see Ian Zierning get swallowed by a shark and then chainsaw his way out. That, by the way, sounds way more awesome than it actually is.