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ah. broken hearted me once more. i've been down this road before with her... damn it all... i hate being a romantic to the core... makes me so unappealing to a realist such as her... she wants friendship, and i'm in no shape to rein my heart in... maybe time can heal me... maybe not... we need distance... or rather she doesn't need to suffer any of my bullshit, while I still haven't figured my bullshit out yet. I'm truly madly for her. But that doesn't mean a goddamn thing, now does it? she will probably never reciprocate, even in the slightest. she cares, but only for my continued friendship. bless her, but yeah. right before i last saw her, last held her, i gave her a love letter i wrote a month back, at my most vulnerable, something i held back until the end. something beautiful and true and something she'll never understand.