i love random phone calls from people i never expect to talk to again. although i say that everytime i talk to her, and she always calls me rmonths later
and yet, she goes on and on about how wonderful i am.
?
?
su:
what the breast are you talkin' about?
no just kidding, I think I know what you're talking about. you could always just keep her on a long leash, so to speak, and see how long she says good things about you.
I don't want to see you getting in a shitty situation.
no just kidding, I think I know what you're talking about. you could always just keep her on a long leash, so to speak, and see how long she says good things about you.
I don't want to see you getting in a shitty situation.
su:
what sort of photos do like taken of yourself.
I've started being creative, though it's not quite the step I was thinking. but it's something I've wanted to do. my dogs...
[Edited on Nov 13, 2004 11:28PM]
I've started being creative, though it's not quite the step I was thinking. but it's something I've wanted to do. my dogs...
[Edited on Nov 13, 2004 11:28PM]
yeah ignore me thats fine. it was never about me anyway. you never asked about the scars all over, you never asked about what matters to me.
sometimes its just fuck you, fuck you.
i get stepped on and immediately run to the one who did it before her. why? its my own fucking fault. they dont hurt me, i do it to myself.
sometimes its just fuck you, fuck you.
i get stepped on and immediately run to the one who did it before her. why? its my own fucking fault. they dont hurt me, i do it to myself.
i must learn to trust my instinct.
everytime i fall, it makes it a little bit easier for the next time. ive become good at shutting off, which scares me because i worked for years to be able to sit with my emotions, and be okay with them.
she still wants to be my friend and get to know me. she said maybe down the...
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everytime i fall, it makes it a little bit easier for the next time. ive become good at shutting off, which scares me because i worked for years to be able to sit with my emotions, and be okay with them.
she still wants to be my friend and get to know me. she said maybe down the...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
su:
I asked Jen for a blowjob today, but she said no.
su:
boredom?
well no it started out that she called Hubbard up to move a pallet, Hubbard was trying to get Jen to give him 5 bucks for moving the pallet. she wasn't going for that, so I suggested that he ask her for a BJ. I figured that way Hubbbard is more likely to get the 5 bucks...
I'll try asking her again tomorrow. maybe I should add that it wouldn't take too long.
well no it started out that she called Hubbard up to move a pallet, Hubbard was trying to get Jen to give him 5 bucks for moving the pallet. she wasn't going for that, so I suggested that he ask her for a BJ. I figured that way Hubbbard is more likely to get the 5 bucks...
I'll try asking her again tomorrow. maybe I should add that it wouldn't take too long.
im so scraed. im fucking terrified of falling in love. and i will not let myself which scares me even more. and i dont think its falling in love im afraid of. its falling in love and then getting hurt, which i have every right to fear, as it has happened several times. and we are not together. but we are not not together either....i...
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su:
youre not alone, I do know what you feel. i have felt that before too.
su:
i wish i could tell you that there was one magical way of overcoming that fear--of falling in love, of letting people get close to you, the risk of getting hurt. i just knew that if I didn't try to let people in I would never overcome the fear. so i just kept pushing myself to let people get close. and at first i got hurt alot, but over time I learned how to read people. I can usually figure out who's nice, and who's bad news. I can these days anyways.
like i said it's no easy solution.
its like with trust. with all trust there's is risk, the risk of that trust being broken. but that doesn't mean you shouldn't trust at all, b/c without it there are no friends. risk is part of it.
don't let your fear, fear you. if you get hurt, thats why you have friends. let your friends in and pick you up, and brush you off, and get you back in the game.
i doubt this really answered your question, but this is stuff I've figured out over time.
like i said it's no easy solution.
its like with trust. with all trust there's is risk, the risk of that trust being broken. but that doesn't mean you shouldn't trust at all, b/c without it there are no friends. risk is part of it.
don't let your fear, fear you. if you get hurt, thats why you have friends. let your friends in and pick you up, and brush you off, and get you back in the game.
i doubt this really answered your question, but this is stuff I've figured out over time.
am i dieing?
su:
you better not be, I'll kill you if you're going to leave me alone in the shithole--no I don't mean the city of Worcester. though that too is a shitnole.
a week? a month? 5 years? a lifetime? who knows.
su:
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, I really need a t-shirt that says, "GFY!"
I miss not seeing you at work. and don't let that get out 
I miss not seeing you at work. and don't let that get out
su:
I went driving the immigrant truck today, or the rolling insult as I like to think of it, and I had to fillout the driving log. there's a section where you have to fill in the reason for driving the vehicle, so instead of writing a one or two word reason, like lumber yard, I wrote a three line rant.
i had a long day.
blah
i had a long day.
blah
a lesson in womens bodies...
cervical cancer can be cut off before it happens. 80 percent of the women in the world carry HPV, and if you get tested, and find out you have it, its completely treatable....which means you will not get cervical cancer. if you let it go, it it very possible to evolve into cancer.
the hpv virus is highly contagious, you...
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cervical cancer can be cut off before it happens. 80 percent of the women in the world carry HPV, and if you get tested, and find out you have it, its completely treatable....which means you will not get cervical cancer. if you let it go, it it very possible to evolve into cancer.
the hpv virus is highly contagious, you...
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su:
Okay, let's see if I can explain this simply.
Shelley
is
NOT
a
Lesbian.
I swear David looked like Rob Zombie in that makeup...
Shelley
is
NOT
a
Lesbian.
I swear David looked like Rob Zombie in that makeup...
wow relationships can be very very very confusing and a lot of work.
but maybe this time it will pay off....i have a feeling it will.
excise me while i go puke...
but maybe this time it will pay off....i have a feeling it will.
excise me while i go puke...
*sigh*
that was an "im swooning" sigh.
that was an "im swooning" sigh.
su:
see i knew that without you explaining it.
you know how I knew?
b/c I have powers beyond that of any ordinary human.
among my arsenal of superpowers: during times of extreme boredom my body has the ability to go into a state of being, where my mind will shut down and divert all resources to keeping the blood circulating thereby eliminating the threat of my limbs falling off.
what does this mean?
well basically that during a staff meeting I can slump down in my chair, my head will fall back, and I can get a hard-on.
you needed that bit of information, didn't you.
you know how I knew?
b/c I have powers beyond that of any ordinary human.
among my arsenal of superpowers: during times of extreme boredom my body has the ability to go into a state of being, where my mind will shut down and divert all resources to keeping the blood circulating thereby eliminating the threat of my limbs falling off.
what does this mean?
well basically that during a staff meeting I can slump down in my chair, my head will fall back, and I can get a hard-on.
you needed that bit of information, didn't you.